As a Transgendered Woman, how do you feel about your past?
Leaving the past behind is part of our lives. We grow, we evoluate (physically, spiritually, emotionally), we sometimes can be compared with cocoons. However, as I said in one of my previous articles, there is an old saying: "those who forget their past shall repeat it over and over again". Yet, most of us choose to totally detach from our past, and live in the present just as we are supposed to. If you ask me, I believe that the past is a part of you, and when you`re done with your transition and you look back into the past, this can really be a self-esteem booster, seeing how much you`ve changed and what a beautiful woman you`ve become after years of struggling.
Regardless of one`s sexual orientation, whether you`re gay, bisexual or transgender, we may have done things in the past that we want to forget, to move on. When talking especially about transgender women and TG men, most of us choose to leave the past behind.
Talking about leaving the past behind, I remember one of videos of Calpernia Addams, where she was revealing some of the most unsuitable questions to ask a transgender. Well, most of these questions were related to the past, such as "what is your real name" (the real name is the one I choose, not the one that was chosen for me), "can I see pics of yourself before your transition?" (course you can, you`re not blind, but you may not), etc.
However, I met many transgenders who accepted their past and somehow still are connected to it by keeping their old names, especially if they were unisex names such as Alex or Drew. Disappearing from your past before your transition could be an option, but for many of us this can be a little hard to accomplish, since so many memories link us to our childhood, our friends and our families, maybe even too many for us to destroy all the photos, all the records with our birth names and simply vanish.
For some of us, life begins after graduation and leaving the home town. For others, life can begin after a divorce from the one they`ve seen as their soul mate. What do you feel about your past? Do you prefer to hide it and forget it, do you live with it or simply deny its existance?
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