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Why do some men prefer transgender women instead of biological women?

Transgender pop singer Harisu at her wedding

Why do some men prefer transgender women instead of biological women?

June 20, 2010 |  by

It is known that most of the bisexual and straight men are mad after transgender people, but why is it so? I`ve been thinking about this question for the past couple of days and I`ve searched over the Internet for the most appropriate answers in order to solve the "mystery". I`ve found some strong reasons why some men prefer transgenders instead of biological women, and here I am not talking strictly about intercourse, I`m also talking about relationships and emotional connection.

One very strong reason is that since transgender women MAY have some typically male physical traits such as big shoulders and proeminent under-jaw, they have to hide them somehow so they never leave the house without make up or you will never see a respectable transgender wearing a piece of clothing that doesn`t suit her and instead of masking the typically male features it highlights them. Men love women that take care of themselves: wear make up, perfume and are always trendy and classy regardless of the situation. I`m not saying that biological women can`t be trendy and classy, I`m just saying that biological women can sometimes appear natural, without make up or anything fancy while most of the transgender women can`t !

Another reason would be that transgender people are said to understand a man better. It`s simple, since transgender women used to be men it is easier for them to understand what a straight or bisexual man thinks and wants from his life partner and not only. This is what men are always looking for in a woman: understanding and tolerance, but sometimes it`s pretty difficult to understand men ( uh... you know what I mean, don`t you? hehe).

In addition to what I`ve said earlier, you probably know that men love beautiful women. Although  some of them may say that they don`t look for beauty but for brains, trust me: they do want beautiful women next to them! So, some of the physical features that men love the most are legs, posterior and breasts. Well, transgender women have them all! Tall, beautiful, with nice legs and bums, transgender women are a delight for most of the men!

If you ask me, this would be the most important reasons why some men love transgender women. It is obvious that not all men prefer a transgender woman instead of a biological one. Moreover, at a certain moment of their lives, they`ll want to have  a family and a couple of children, thing that it`s not possible so far with a transgender woman, unfortunately ... .

To sum up, I`d like to ask all the readers to tell me what they think regarding the topic I`m talking about in this article. Why do you think some bisexual and straight men prefer transgender women instead of biological women? What is the reason and what would be the consequences a relationship a straight man would have with a transgender upon his family and friends?

Related posts:

  1. Transgender area - Transgender models
  2. Transgenders and transgender surgery.

160 Comments


  1. There she is.. on the street, shopping as usual. High heels, long legs and... look at those boobs, dude :smile: . A cutie transgender girl walking on the pavement. I must talk to her, you don't see a transgender that pretty every day. I go to her, tap her shoulder and smile . Of course, she smiles back since i'm gorgeous myself :smile: . "Xcuse me , u dropped this" i say, showing her a movie ticket (guess who has the sit next to her ;-) ). "I believe i do, she says", i grab her hand and we head to the mall.
    Some of you may ask why? Well , that's because some time ago i have met a special transgender girl who is now my girlfriend, and who has shown me the meaning of love and commitment. A trangender gal is always a pretty girl and, trust me, they can cook any food you'd dream of.
    Coming back , i must say that this blog positively ROCKS, it covers a wide range of topics revolving around gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender life, lots of useful tips not just for the LGBT community, but for life in general and the articles are written in a very pertinent fashion.

    Keep up the good work, Persona!
    We all love you (and one of us does it in a very special way!)

    Kisses

  2. Men that have good taste and with class recognize the difference between GGs who don't have to work at being feminine and TGs who pour their heart into the transition. . . . TGs work at "passing" and being as feminine as they can and that is what attracts men. . . . If a fellow doesn't care what his women look like, he isn't for you. . . He only cares about himself and that won't make it. . .

    Marilyn in Dallas

  3. "I hope you like the Sherlock Holmes series, it`s on cinema right now", he nicely said to me while I could still see him smiling and hoping for a positive answer. "Of course I do, it is more about the company rather than the movie itself", I replied thrilled and anxious to see his next step. What will he do? Will he introduce himself, will he ask for my telephone number? He simply complemented me on my looks and he was absolutely surprised to find out I was a transgender. This would be Persona non Grata and Sher Khan`s story, to put it in a nutshell.

  4. so true girl

  5. I whole heartedly agree with your comments and ideas

  6. :razz: I have discussed this topic with several of my male friends and they all tell me without hesitation is that a transwomen will always work at looking and being feminine in attitude and appearance, they adore this trait, sex is not that important as a women that ENJOYS looking feminine 24/7.

  7. I have several straight pubs I visit on a regular basis and it has not been uncommon to strike up conversations with presumably hetero guys at the bar.
    For the most bar the men are middle aged professional types.
    Here is my top reasons we get along.
    1.- Yes I do work hard to be as attractive as I can. (I'm told I present well)
    2.-I don't want to have their baby. No pressure.
    3.-I don't want their checkbook. (But they can buy me a drink! :razz: )
    4.-I can talk a real "mean" sports conversation. (Or cars or work)
    5.-I do understand their day to day problems and job pressures. (the conversation is ALL about them)
    6.-I won't nag.
    7.-I don't need or expect a long term relationship. (back to the baby part) You see I'm not on a date count before I want a ring.
    8.-I'm real discreet. (don't take me home to meet your family)
    9&10.-I just work harder to look better and be more attentive to a guy.
    Traits that most women have tossed aside.
    For the most part, I used to shy away from talking to men on a "one on one" basis. (I'm normally by myself.)
    Recently I've changed all of that. Most of my conversations have proved I can compete socially with GG's and I love it.
    Being in the middle does have it's benefits on occasion.

  8. One of the most well written articles I've seen over the years. Excellent work!

  9. I can only speak for myself. But I love transwomen because:

    -A lady with something extra underneath. For me, that is hot
    -A transgender woman embraces femininity without apology. Sexy lingerie, frilly panties. It's retro feminine. Just drives me wild.

  10. Nice article, I agree that TS will make that extra effort to look fabulous. That extra feminine look combined with the long legs is very attractive.
    I also agree about the statement that TS understand guys better.

  11. It's nice to see an article addressing this question and it makes some interesting points.

    As someone who exclusively dates transgender women, my own perspective is that it just fits some men and the attraction is still strong regardless of if they are all dressed up. It's the personality that shines through and an ability to connect.

    Some transwomen that are attractive to me are too masculine looking for most men's tastes and the sexual part of the relationship with a transwoman is not every man's cup of tea. I tend to think that there are a section of guys who fall somewhere between gay and straight that find their proper place with a transgender partner, but it wont work for most men.

  12. Yes I agree with you, being with a transgender is all a matter of taste and perception. Thank you for your comment!

  13. Good thing I don't date transgender chasers. Even though I blend well and I'm rarely without a few guys wanting to take me out, I didn't transition so that I could fill some dated idea of "ideal femininity". I express my womanhood in a completely natural and unaffected manner. Lines like the ones above dealing with how trans girls try harder to look like women are a good indication to me that the guy isn't my equal and I'll quickly tire of his attentions.

    It's the guys who like transgender women because they see our strength, determination, force of will, and survival instinct. The ones who can value the specific insights that being trans or having a trans history can bring to a relationship. Those are the guys I consider worth my time.

  14. "... since transgender women used to be men..."

    Really? Any person who transitions to female was probably never a 'man,' i.e., someone who self-identifies as such.

    That detail aside, the phenomenon of transwomen-loving men, straight or otherwise, is a looming wave on the horizon, because the universe of transwomen will increasingly comprehend young and very young transitioners, girls whose bodies were never distorted by testosterone poisoning to signal their male-bodied past. There are a few such very lucky girls running around but I suspect they're mostly fully woodworked. So for now, until their numbers swell, who can say?

    There's a flip side to this. Since these very young transitioners never live as adult males they will be less likely to better understand men.

    Regrettably, there will probably always be transwomen who miss that very early transition boat and thus will be compelled to live as males.

    In the meantime, it's fascinating to observe this curious phenomenon. I blend perfectly and so I'm a beneficiary yet it's not all smooth sailing. Broadly speaking, older and better-educated men are better bets. When we click, it's great. To them, I'm a woman - period, paragraph. I doubt my femininity more than they do.

  15. You know what they say? "The best of both worlds!"
    I have to say: Sometimes it is worse of both worlds. Hahaha. But i like it difficult.
    To handle a GG hormonal special days only once a month is maybe ... to easy :o ) ?

    Living since 9 years in relationship[s] with Asian Special Girls teaches me a lot. It is sometimes not that easy, like some "experts" talk about, after there research on some websites or shortime experiences after 7 days and nights in Thailand.
    There is not typical statement or manual about HOW TO LIFE WITH A MAN/WOMAN . . . so for transgenders. I really don't understand why there are books on the market about "LADYBOYS" with examples of 5 persons life. Information vs. Misinformation. I prefer to "read" the girls life who sleeps beside me...DAILY !

    I am also part of this community and my main feeling about male-ts relationships are > DON'T KEEP IT AS SECRET ! Be proud about your special girl. Most man i met with ts relationships or adventures would never let there family, colleagues or friends know about. Why ? I guess they are worry to be seen as GAY or not normal, evil in some religions. I feel myself even not bisexual, even most ppl. would think about me that way. I don't care about definitions or Wikipedia [man - man love: Homosexual] search results. YES evil sometimes but that not depends on the partner i have :o )
    If you google for Thai ladyboys you get thousands of sex pages. "sex hungry beauties in stocking and heels". It is hard to find background stories or real information. Everybody knows> At 34 degrees stockings in daily life are just men dream.
    Why i like the girls with the extra ? Because i love it ! No matter she did her make up or not, wears hells or flip flops.
    If i have to explain WHY: Than you would not understand.

    Do you like Cesar Salad ?
    How about Cesar Salad without Cesar Dressing .... ?

    Greetings

    MIKE BANGKOK THAILAND :arrow:

  16. im transgenderd and i get alot of attention from guys but i love it when i get with someone i like cause ususlly ends up me and them falling in love. They ususlly straight and they are usually the guy that all the straight girls love. I really love men because they are so lovely and i really like the shine in their eye.

  17. I think many men that like TS also like women. But it can be easier for guys to relate to TS because of their past experiences.

  18. Your blog article is very intersting and fanstic, at the same time the blog theme is Specific and Good, great job.

  19. My thoughts are that a transwoman is not as high maintenance as some genetic women are and a transwoman is more apt to give a man more space and not control him as much as some GGs do.

  20. Im a transgender women every man i every been with love women.That makes me feel more like a women.And yes i like feeling pretty and yes i put on make up every day but i do it for my self.And yes men love us and i love them.A gay man told me one time i don't want you your a women i want a man.That made me feel good.

  21. I have been living as a man for the past 3o years now and I have enough.
    Recently I have been evaluating my life, how unhappy I have become. I realize that I would only be ultimately happy If I will be with a straight man or I will forever be single.

    I have never slept with women since birth. I only watch straight porn because I want to watch the straight man, not the woman. Gay porn doesn't turn me on honestly. It's really the straight men that catches my attention.

    I am planning to start with hormones anytime soon. What hormones and where to get it, I have no clue.
    I am pushing 30 now and very very very unhappy. My ultimate happiness would be with living with a straight man! Not gay, not bi, and definitely not a woman :lol:

    Anybody can help me with my transition. What stuff to buy and where?

  22. Lea, I am telling you now from my very own experience that you must not play with hormones. Don`t listen to anybody who tell you to go and buy any particular hormone replacing therapy treatment, please go and visit a doctor who specializes in hormones (an endocrinologist). Don`t be ashamed to pay the endocrinologist a visit and tell them what you intend to do. He will then prescribe you pills who will significantly improve your looks and turn you into a woman.

    Good luck, and if you have any questions regarding transitioning, please ask me. However, I cannot provide you with the info regarding "what stuff to buy", because it it all about your health. I now have certain health issues because of this, and I tell every single transgender woman who wants to start HRT that she should firstly visit a doctor.

    Good luck again, Lea, see you around and thanks for the interest & comment!

  23. Lea, please leave me your e-mail address and I shall contact you. The "Contact" section on this blog has other purposes than that, so please leave me your e-mail address in a comment. I won`t approve it, I will be the only one to see it then I`ll delete it, ok?

  24. I would never date a bisexual man, that includes a so called "hetero" who dates transgendered. There is something disturbing about a man that dates a fake woman.

    The only men that prefer fake women aka the transgendered are those who cannot get dates.

    So far, every man I have been with would commit suicide before dating a transgendered person. At the end of the day, the men that want to have kids will never settle for less.

    So while transgendered women try to boost their self esteem by acting like they are somehow better than real women because bisexual men prefer them, just remember, once he is ready to have kids (that will inherit his genes and even looks) he is going to drop you quickly. You guys laugh at us real women but the reality is, he only sees you for the unlimited sex you can provide. And only those with self esteem issues are okay with something like that.

    Ta-ta for now "ladies".

  25. You`re so ignorant when it comes to transgenderism. First of all, there`s no such thing as "real woman" and "fake woman". There are only women, and believe it or not, 90% of the transgenders do look better than genetic women. Live with it, honey bee.

    Second of all, that`s your opinion. If you say that men want us for sex only, it means that you`re even more limited than I thought you were. Trust me, men can easily have kids with other women and raise them with their transgender girlfriend/wife.

    You should be ashamed of yourself. You`re a a person full of prejudice, and you`re living in the past century. Which is just sad.

  26. does a genetic woman that can not have children make her any less of a woman?

  27. GG here,,, YEAH, BABY

    I'm a GG and love TGs. Top-surgery TS' are sexy to me, too. I'm attracted to FS post ops but could not marry one. Unless we find ourselves a husband we could agree on and vice-versa (yes, I'm quite serious).
    I'm straight as a board, have always been.

    TGs have a higher intelligence quotient than the general population. Most have wonderful hearts and make great friends (and possibly partners...I haven't dated one yet, though).

    I don't plan on having sex with any T-women unless or until I find the one I'm ready to settle with.

    So far, I'm not really impressed with most of the male admirers you girls deal with. The gentlemen are rare...many are too typically male and care mostly about themselves. (yes, entitlement exists for both sexes, it just manifests itself different for each gender)

    It's up to you ladies to set your standards higher and insist on being appreciated for who you are.

  28. @Debra: i don't understand the first part, they never was a man :?:

  29. I think people can do what ever they want and i have no problem with anybody. If i met a person with a nice spirit, TS Women or otherwise, i would not reject or shame them. however, i do find transgendered women and the idea of taking authenticity of femininity and deeming it yours, extremely disrespectful, and in an interesting but real way; it is quite sexist!Before being a woman, (not a real women or tranny woman or what ever) but a WOMAN! (that is the only kind) SHE has to be a girl!! What makes a woman a woman is not high heels, and being sexy and knowing how to fuck. SCIENCE! proves that genders are made for REPRODUCTION!!! also, as i said before, being a woman is not about being the stereo typical female. straight men who prefer transgendered women (the few who do) must deep down be sexist, because all of theses favorable traits TS women APPEAR to have, seem like stereo typical fifties house wife traits. What about the women who were born women and had to endure the pain of being considered a lesser being simply because they were BORN a woman? Yes, we women do like to primp up and be feminine but there are time when we have to put that aside, and be women, not objects, there are times when we have to throw up hair up in a pony tail, put on some old jeans and get dirty because the average female college graduate STILL makes $8 less than the average male who has had the exact same training.its women like that who made it possible for us to be in high places. There are so many women who worked hard to get us where we are today. They did this so again; we can be WOMEN not objects. But i doubt TS women care. Because they like being in the there little bubble of false womanhood, and do not want to step out. they don't mind the "primping and pampering" everyday, and the man ruling over them, because that's what they think a woman is.well guess what, ITS NOT. What determines womanhood, mind body and soul, is every way anyone has every reacted to you in anyway possible since the day you came out of the whom. Everyone's presumptions and all of the major and minor demographics affecting your life. One of the most important of all variables that can determine certain experiences that are inevitable in your life form the day you were born, is whether you were born a boy... or a girl! There are certain feelings and emotions and spiritual communications that no one who was born a man will EVER be able to comprehend, simply because they were born a man. you cannot grow into a woman, without being a girl first! So to deem your self a woman because you reinforce a stereotype, is very disrespectful.

    Another thing, what about the little girls who were born females, and the women who don't exactly look like, what TS women pay so much money to look like? what about the woman who cant even get a date, and she sees some TS woman running off with the man she wishes she could have? See what that would do to millions of women around the world, and little girls? The poor girls will grow up thinking that they are not worthy. They'll think "what sad excuse for a woman am i, if desirable women looks like this? and i cant fit that mold? and a man can do it better than i can?" (though its not even natural) That is such a sad and twisted paradox. Its just saying, "never mind all the other aspects of being a woman, this is what a woman is; sex appeal, how many men want to fuck you; all the effort you put (which is SO much) into maintaining this false image"

    THAT IS NOT A WOMAN! Its sad that the essence of a woman has been degraded to the ultimate degree of cheapness, and imitation.

    Plus most men like women who are naturally radiant. at the end of the day, a man wants a woman who wont say, "don't, you'll get my hair wet" a woman who doesn't wake up 5 hours earlier than he does, the morning after, so she can get "situated" a woman who can hang with the guys, not because she understand what its like to have once been one, but because she has those missing pieces that men don't have, and just naturally knows how to gel with them because she adds a friendly opposite appeal to a group of men that perfectly fits the atmosphere, because opposites attract.

    As many physically gorgeous and physically beautiful trans women i have seen, give me a few minutes and i can always tell that there is something missing about this particular "woman". i can generally tell right away, even with the utterly drop dead gorgeous ones. idk, maybe its a spiritual thing.

    plus, apparently men like the TS woman's acknowledgment of his preferences and trying to be beautiful and feminine. So they like the effort the TS woman puts into being beautiful? if it were so right for a man to cange his sex, why would "she" have to even try SO GOD DAMN HARD?! A man wants a woman who is EFFORTLESSLY radiant. Not women who practices walking like women and talking like women, and studying femininity. if you have to try that hard to "be yourself", you are NOT being yourself.

  30. i hope i did not offend anyone, that was not my intentions, but this is offensive to me. being a woman, i think that, transgendered women, are transgendered women and nothing more. they are not women, and they could never be as authentic... Im sure many would think it wrong if if an Asian was like, "all my life, i felt Caucasian, i am going to dye my hair blonde, get permanent blue contacts and get plastic surgery. I will then be a full fledged Caucasian person. The state will have to recognize me as a pure Caucasian. i'll be the best Caucasian man in the world!" ridiculous.

  31. to jessica
    I feel sorry for you........... If you haven't get any where in life and man not want to date you is not cause ts is because of the way woman like you think...............
    I am a woman even if I was born with a male part that is a birth defect I not need 5 houers for make up 5 minutes is all I need I do get dirty and I never learn or try to copy at you....... I walk on heels 8 inches tall no problem I not want to copy or stereotype as a woman cause I am woman
    I speak 6 diferent lenguages and have a master degree and I am only 24 I make more then the average man an houer and I am (ts) as you say well I think you are a rude woman who I not care what you think abouy usss cause you will never understand cause you will never be in our shoes ................. I am latina no white and won't try to be one like your example of an Asian ??????? Realy I am pround of who I am and will never copy or learn how to look or be a woman cause I simply not need that I am a woman this website is not free speach they did not let me post how I realy feel about you they delete my first coment the only thin last to say I have for you is that god bless you have a good life and I am sorry you feel that way about me cause you not know me or what I have gone true and I hope you not atack a ts outside as you say you can tell who is one and who is not cause there is some thin missin in me well you have some thin missin to ......... Love for others and respect ................

  32. Dear Paloma

    This site PROMOTES the freedom of speach, as long as bad language stays out of the comments! I have deleted your previous comment due to the bad language, but since you have rephrased it, I have approved this one.

    I hope you understand, and I would like to congratulate you for the fact that you followed college and you studied. You are a very good example for the transgender community.

    Best regards

  33. well I do understand but this lady use tranny woman and you know how ofensive that word is for uss beside all the other bad remarks

  34. I know, dear Paloma. The only way to deal with such remarks is to be polite, like you were in the last comment.

    I wish you a wonderful day!

  35. As a man who loves ts women, and as a man who has had many female partners (girlfriends not wives) before my current ts girlfriend, i have to say that a beautiful and sweet ts woman is far better than anything any ordinary woman can provide.

    I had not been able to develop feelings for any of the women I'd been with.But somehow, i've been able to develop feelings for my current ts gf.

    I'm not dating a ts woman becasue i can't get dates, and im not dating a ts woman because im bisexual (im heterosexual).I'm dating a transgender woman because i prefer ts women.

    Honestly, all gay men should start transforming themselves into transgender women.That would make the lives of millions of straight men, like myself, ten times better.

  36. Oh and i prefer pre-op transexual women.

    To ts lover:

    How come it wont work for most men when most men i know love transsexual porn?
    most of my straight friends including me like transsexual porn.

    It's a fact.Men like women with penises.

  37. To Jessica:

    "SCIENCE! proves that genders are made for REPRODUCTION!!!"

    You don't need science to tell you that.But the problem is: There are already around 8 billion people on this planet.
    You, women, especially Asian women, should consider stopping breeding for some hundred years, because at this rate, when we become 50 billions in 2050, getting a job will be harder than ever.

    "straight men who prefer transgendered women (the few who do) must deep down be sexist, because all of theses favorable traits TS women APPEAR to have, seem like stereo typical fifties house wife traits"

    I prefer ts women and I'm not sexist in any way.I prefer ts women because I'm physically and psychologically more attracted to them. Because i know i can get along perfectly with a ts woman.
    And btw, men who like ts women are not few.Most men i know of love ts porn, so it's not a rare thing for a straight man to love ts women.

    "What about the women who were born women and had to endure the pain of being considered a lesser being simply because they were BORN a woman? Yes, we women do like to primp up and be feminine but there are time when we have to put that aside, and be women, not objects, there are times when we have to throw up hair up in a pony tail, put on some old jeans and get dirty because the average female college graduate STILL makes $8 less than the average male who has had the exact same training.its women like that who made it possible for us to be in high places. There are so many women who worked hard to get us where we are today"

    Another selfish and sexist-feminist point you make there.
    equality is a very new concept that has been achieved only recently in the Western societies first and other societies later.

    A hundred years ago, people in Russia ,for example, were not considered equal.The aristocrat men and women had actual men and women servants.

    most people half a century ago did not have the right to vote, and allot of them around the world still don't.IT's not just women who didn't have the right to vote.

    In Ancient times men who were born weak were considered lesser men.And footmen were considered lesser than knights, which were considered lesser than generals...

    In nature, things really are not equal.trying to force equality and assimilation on a diverse and complex system such as society is completely unnatural.

    Men on average make more money than women because of the kind of jobs men do.It has nothing to do with sexism,.It has to do with the fact that jobs that require physical strength and stamina pay more and are the jobs where men dominate.

    There are so many great people that worked hard to spread the ideas and concepts of democracy, human right, republic, elections and voting, parliament, equality before the law...etc
    And the great scientists who's discoveries and inventions produce the current state of technology that we have today, which enables us to have those "new kind" of jobs and professions that both men and women can have.

    "There are certain feelings and emotions and spiritual communications that no one who was born a man will EVER be able to comprehend, simply because they were born a man"

    Who cares about that? If i, as a man, can't "comprehend" those "feeling", than they are of no importance to me.
    actually most of the crap that goes in your minds is totally irrelevant to me.

    "Plus most men like women who are naturally radiant. at the end of the day, a man wants a woman who wont say, "don't, you'll get my hair wet" a woman who doesn't wake up 5 hours earlier than he does, the morning after, so she can get "situated" a woman who can hang with the guys, not because she understand what its like to have once been one, but because she has those missing pieces that men don't have, and just naturally knows how to gel with them because she adds a friendly opposite appeal to a group of men that perfectly fits the atmosphere, because opposites attract."

    My ts girlfriend doesn't wake up 5 hours before me and doesn't act the way you described at all.
    You don't understand: Ts women are women born in the wrong body.
    though i'd say my girlfriend is like a perfect woman when it comes to mental stability and communication.
    A ts woman for me is more than a woman.A ts woman is the ultimate woman a straight man could have.

    You think too highly of your gender, and care too much for women without any consideration for men and what they go/have had to go through.
    You actually sound like a perfect lesbo.Why do you need a man in the first place?

  38. I like TS girls much bettr than GG. I don't rlly date pre-ops, I prefer post operation bcuz then they're 100% woman both emotionally an physically. They're more understanding, don't complain as much, and are sexy. Lots of girls are way too needy, and TS girls are more self reliant and don't need constant attention. I still date GG, but I prefer TS women.

  39. Garrett

    after my 2nd wife, i wae in line to buy a ticket yo mars for a new breed of women. i am to vain, i am all man, very rhett butler, i like pretty lady's
    i found the 3rd sex, what i have been looking for with going to mars

    i remaim
    rhett

  40. I'm straight and I find many transgendered women extremely attractive because they do have strong shoulders and jaws; I find those traits to be attractive in biological women as well.

    I don't really have a lean toward trangendered women though, really, but I'm not put off by them at all.

    As far as being in a relationship with one, I might, but I think I would be too intimidated by them and way too concerned about how to treat them to become comfortable with it.

  41. Granted there are some transgendered women that look better than women. Why is this? They work harder at it.

    Some have wigs, weaves and hair extensions because their own hair won't naturally grow that long. I am naturally a DD bust, how many TG's have big natural breasts? My lips don't need collagen and most men don't like it if I wear make-up.(makes me look like a harlot...even mild) Okay so I am happen to be a born a natural beauty, but belive me, I have ugly days and can look quite unattractive by my standards. I don't have to wake up though and put on make up because I don't look right if I am not all made up---you know I am a woman make up or not. How many transgendered women without their make-up look a "real" woman?

    I don't have the desire to wear high heels and dresses all the time and look stunningly beautiful. I don't need to have my penis turned into a vagina to have the real experience of being a woman. I bleed from my menstrual cycle because I am able to reproduce. (let's not talk about real women with health problems and cannot reproduce. It is just that, they are real women but cannot reproduce it's not due to their perfectly genetically made vagina and some can "hormones" to be able to reproduce. Some make eggs and just get a surrogate if they are rich enough.

    Transgenedered woman also make you feel more accepted because on the whole, they are not accepted by society. Some transgendered look like "Frankenstein" because they just weren't meant to look like a woman. You also though have real females who have butchered up themselves thanks to plastic surgery. "Str8" men---if they still have something "extra" underneath, you are having gay sex. How can they possibly understand you better when they are messed up psychologically because these are males on their birth certificates now thinking they are more women than a real woman can ever be with collagen injected lips, genetically made expensive vaginas, and breasts jobs(some are horrible, fake hair, enough make up on their face for one day to last a lifetime.

    You show me a dressed down transgendered woman that still looks hot and I'll get off my soapbox. You can never be me and by that I mean, a woman who has children and will be called Grandmother one day. I don't mind transgendered women who know what they are and are proud of it. It's the ones who hide behind their lie.

  42. In my case (I'm a straight man), it boils down to a few points:

    Transwomen are beautiful- those I've been with.

    They have partly male brain that allows me more easily to connect. I'm put off by typically feminine women & their illogical lamentations, jealousies, hysterics and mood-swings (OK, this one does happen, sometimes, with tw).

    Since I don't want children- the great stuff is I don't have to bother about condoms, coitus interruptus and other off-putting stuff.

    No menstrual stuff, no PMS, no shopping sprees, just a bit of girl-talk I'm not forced to listen.

    I've never found a male form physically attractive-I'm as "straight" as one can be. Also, I've never found some typically male interests (sports, cars, ..) anything but boring. In the same time, typically feminine frame of mind tended to exasperate me with what I perceived as exhibitionism, faux helplessness and irrationality. What I wanted was a female form with mostly-but not completely- female brain and residual male mind, and without all these female excretions and never ending cycles and fluids.

    I found the in transwomen- or, better, *the* transwoman I'm currently with - the ideal partner I want to live with -physically, emotionally, intellectually. Plus- she doesn't read romance novels, but the stuff I'm also into- history, politics, popular science, theology, ..non-fiction in general.

  43. To:missdelite

    How can you be so critically negative about uss .........I have no medical procedure done to my face I am natural and not think you understand that the transgender you saw that you call frankenstain may be are only on the first year of treatments. Any way who are you? To talk that way haaa your to pride about your self I may say in a point selfish and in love with your self well let me tell you one thin honey there is more frankenstain biological woman out there then there is a ugly transgender I have never meet a ts that look bad..

    Is a fat life is hard for uss ts but we not want people to feel sorry for uss we are not spetial but we are strong and any way I got to say I fell sorry for all this people that comments are so out of place educate your self respect others and god bless you

  44. hello guys im pre-op transexual 34 years old and im proud in being what i am.i love women and i respect them.but when some women come with the statement that we are woman with penis is not offende and actualy true and my opinion is with penis or not we act ,understand and respect men most they do.is a huge fight for being so feminine and looking great everyday but in some point wer get use to it and after this everything for us is so easy.being beautiful is not hard if u really want ,but when u find escuse all the time that come on front the lazy problem.

  45. I want to congratulate Jessica first of all bc she said what a lot of straight woman wants to in a very polite manner. I do not neccesarily agree with all of what you say but in a nutshell, well said. Poloma,my dear I am an insanely beautiful mixed raced African woman (with no problem attracting men),currently living in Mexico a very openly accepting culture of all trans ppl for the simple fact that some of their Aztec Gods were Trans and widely accepted before the invasion of the Spanish. Also being from South Africa I have been around what we call "moffies" all my life. I do accept them for who they are and I am even currently in a relationship with a bi-sexual man who has slept and had relationships with Trans woman. Now, you have said some not so nice things about what Jessica must go through but honey child she is just expressing an opinion as every one else is in this forum,so if you cannot deal with it then be quiet. I see you doing exactly the same thing that straight ppl do to you, you are judging based on an assumption. You don't know this woman and have no place making this comment about her and it only makes you petty and disrespectful of yourself and your kind. I have read this article and can truly say some of what is said disgusts me to my core.

    Let's start with the fact that Tgirls objectify themselves when us woman have worked so hard to uplift ourselves from the opression of men,I also speak quite a few languages,have lived on 4 continents and visited a few more and got to know cultures. I won't even go into my educational background bc we'll be here forever. I implore of all tgirls out there if you want to be perceived as the woman you are work at being equal to men and I'm not by any means saying be less sexy but use your inteligence to get by and not your physical powers. I know I will get attacked for my next statement but so be it. I do believe that the men that sleep with tgirls pre or post opp is either bi or gay. If you have to look at the situation from a realistic point of view and no feelings involved. That man knows full well he isn't dealing with a born woman and will still have relations with you and that is the deciding factor here. I also have heard from my moffie friends that say these men call themselves straight in front of other ppl but in private have no problem sucking them off and saying things to justify their actions like: I don't mind doing it I don't see it as a penis just a long clit. Are you kidding me right now? Accept it for what it is you are with a physical man once you accept who you are then the world will accept others better.

    I do feel sorry for ppl who are judged for being different but also be proud of who and what you are. I am a mixed raced woman in my 30's who has worked hard to be where I am I have not stepped on anyone to get where I am but have also not shy'd away from what I am. Tgirls be strong and know that you are loved but bitches if I ever catch one of you giving me the side eye cause I look better that you do in the street,club or church you will get the same treatment any other woman would,that being I will stomp on you...Loved everyones opinions even if I don't agree with them all

  46. @ Bardon, 1 word...DENIAL,LOL. You are soooooo full of it hahahahaha and I'm sorry for finding this amusing but it is. Sweetheart you want and I quote :a female form with mostly-but not completely- female brain and residual male mind, and without all these female excretions and never ending cycles and fluids. You want a MAN,full stop,period. BC all the things you've mentioned are inherently what makes a woman a WOMAN. Now I'm gonna need you to sit down and do a Full evaluation of your feelings towards the ONE that you have in your life and apart from physique you are describing your perfect man,hell you're describing MY perfect man hahahahaha.

    Thank you for basically answering the question at hand and let us know how that evaluation went I'm sure it will be a groundbreaking experience.

    P.S I don't read romance novels either matter of fact I seldom read fiction.

  47. To:angel

    I am not mexican only cause I say I am latina well good for you and your cane congratulations on ben with a man that slep with ts I not belive how can you be proud of that but again as you say I only give an opinion god bless you. ...

  48. To :Angel

    I will never look at you less then cause you sexy ...
    and me personaly will never be available to put my self equal to man only cause of my bad expiriences in the past I am single and may be always will be I not need a man to be happy gay,by,Straigth wherever he is they all man dush bags with no feelings I was raip two times by man in the past and may be that is why I see then as monsters and never be available to past that ........

    Jessica make me mad I guess I over react and say stupid words with out thinking at that point I not hide people who I am? To do that I not belive I am better then you or any woman I only try to be who I am and how I am happy I may not be beutifull outside but I am a beutyfull for the inside ...
    I was born in costa diva and raid btw spain cause my mom is from there and el Salvador litle country in central america that is so cool that mexicans are that way and they bade gods that where transgender I have friends from Mexico and they tell me they not like gay guys cause they are machos in mexico cool........

    So what 4 languages you speak? I guess spanish rite? May be one when I live in Spain I only got the chance to get in to italian.french and portugues cause I was in school and my parents got divorse and I was going true a big conflic inside me about my gender I got depress Terapy and try to kill my self 3 times oviously did not do good job cause I stil here ......

    So no love I not fell better then you only care full with that man cause if he is by you not what to go true wonder where he is or ben he or she you sound like a well educated and good woman I agree whit all you say I belive if a guy what to be whit a pre op he is gay,by sexual or confuse but no Straigth I have only Straigth friends and they belive the sa
    e so we go true discution of this a lot but at the end they love me no matter who I am .....

    Good luck take care carefull I hear mexico is danger country to be and thank you for your opinion okiss xoxo

  49. I just wanted to say thank you guys so much! Reading these posts made me feel so much better, maybe one day I will find true love and the fact that I'm transgender is going to make our love even more special! <3

  50. I think Thai ladyboys are the most feminine, sexiest, attractive women on earth. I am dying to get married to a post-op Thai kathoey. Just search for Miss Tiffany's Universe at Youtube and you'll know what I mean...

  51. @ Sandy

    I want regular sex with human being who looks like
    a woman- without off-putting masculine traits like
    hair on torso (I've got enough of it myself) etc.-
    & to live with a partner who doesn't irritate me with explosions
    of irrational jealousy, inane pursuits like shopping psychotherapy
    & all.

    And I got it. A transwoman, not a man, not a biological woman.

  52. Like Shamiqua, thank you..
    sometimes I feel that I am not lovable and just an object of mocking, difficult feelings.. I am happy that some men love and prefer us

  53. After reading some of these comments i decided to drop my two cents about transsexual women, and my experience with my ts girlfriend.

    Now firstly, I'm as straight as they come.I'm not even bi-curious.
    I'm strongly turned on by the transsexual form though.I watch transsexual porn exclusively.Straight porn still excites me, but not as much, not even close.
    I consider myself heterosexual, as i said, I'm not turned on by men or gay porn.

    It all started when i watched this porno years ago, was 17 back then, and when this transsexual actress got naked and i saw boobs with an erect,big penis in one package, i got turned on so much, it changed my life upside down..

    After years of relationships with women, i decided to try a ts-women, and boy, am i glad i did?
    I met this ts woman last year.I had graduated from college, got a great job, and was looking for a partner to share life with. She was in the middle of her transition.We got along real well, and man, on our first date, she invited me to her place and i got to experience the pleasure of having sex with a transsexual, and it was amazing.

    Now almost a year and a half later, we're living together, and planning on buying a house and getting married...
    I convinced her to stay the way she is and not go through a "genitalia modification surgery".

    I've never been happier in my life.I love her and care for her deeply.she's truly the ultimate woman that I'd been dreaming of, both mentally and physically.

    To all the guys who crave ts-women, I say go for it. Don't wait. Life is t short to be wasted.

  54. @ Frank

    I know it's a bit vulgar, but I have to ask: do you engage
    in sex activities where you "play" with her male organ ?
    If yes- and I suppose so- then, by definition, there is a "bi"
    component in your personality. I just can't meddle with other
    people's penises, sorry.

  55. Sex = male and female

    Gender = masculine and feminine

    So in essence:

    Sex refers to biological differences; chromosomes, hormonal profiles, internal and external sex organs.

    Gender describes the characteristics that a society or culture delineates as masculine or feminine

    Some examples of sex characteristics :

    Women menstruate while men do not
    Men have testicles while women do not
    Women have developed breasts that are usually capable of lactating, while men have not
    Men generally have more massive bones than women.

    The simple fact here is that we refer to anyone who is Trans as Transgendered for a reason. So infact if you are a man who is involved with,having sex with,dating or in a relationship with a TransGENDERED woman you are in fact with a biological(SEX) male not what she identifies with but which chromosomes she was born with bc you can change your genitalia yes for sure and you can take hormones ofcourse but I have yet to hear about a chromosone transplant.

    So I'm not trying to judge and like I said to each their own but I am infact looking at this in a very realistic manner and these are the FACTS
    that prevail.

    All males have both a Y chromosome AND an X chromosome while ALL females have two XX.
    So if you feel that you are a "straight" man attracted to a transgender woman doesn't that bring into question exactly how straight you are with yourself. You will also see I haven't brought emotion into the equation bc that infact is not what we are looking at bc then yes you are infact with a WOMAN bc that would be your perception of what you would want a woman to be. So like Bardon and Frank said they are with a women it's just that their type of women (that they get aroused at...self admittedly) has Lab engineered breasts and a NATURAL penis or a Lab engineered vagina. And as for the hair,do you know how much your "woman" pays to have them removed? Wether it be with wax or electrolysis?

    Goodluck to all in their life choices I'm just keeping it real...an opinion nothing more nothing less,KISSES

  56. Transsexual women are more understanding, they're more comfortable (at least that's how i feel), and I like their bodies - boobs with a penis is a big turn for me on.

    I'm in a relationship with a transsexual woman and it's amazing.
    And to all the guys who are in relationships with transsexual women, don't hide it, you'll hurt her and make here feel unworthy.Be proud of her, she's your special woman.

  57. I'm a transwoman. I date men. I've invested quite a bit of time, effort, and money toward looking good. I think I'm pretty tolerant and understanding - not only with men, but with people in general.
    Still, I don't recognize myself in this article.

    Maybe relationships of the sort described in the article really do work for those involved in them; but what isn't mentioned in the article are the superficiality and the narcissism at work in such relationships.

    I'm looking for something deeper, and I suspect that most of us, transgender or not, are as well.

  58. This entry makes me Lol. These are all stereotypes. LOL. This is like %1 of either demographic, trans, or chasers.

  59. I think a bigger reason men find ts women more interesting is because they are!!! Unfortunatley, genetic women are very judgemental, have lots of negative things to say about men (as if there aren't plenty of negative things to say about them)and they generally lack a realistic understanding of things and are often just plain old boring.

    I prefer women because that's the way I was born, unfortunately, but I'll tell you, if I had a choice in that, I would rather be with a man any day of the week. They are more exciting, have more fun and have more of a zest and excitement for life. You've never heard of gay man bed death, but we all know that lesbian bed death is a reality so many have to deal with.

    Generally speaking, men are just plain old more approachable, okay with women's imperfections and just basically more realistic and worldy. As a result, I think, ts women are going to win out every time because they were once men and most of them are pretty incredible people.

  60. I just noticed that post by this woman, Sandy. This is exactly what I mean. Firstly, she has absolutely no idea what she is talking about and has no idea what gender really means. Apparently, her view of what cponstitutes a male or female is all physically based--which is totally funny because gender is not a physical trait, nor can it be found in one. Did you ever hear of a surgeon removing a bad gender? But the point is that there is a serious problem with genetic women and bigotry towards LGBT people, in poarticular ts women. Many genetic women are judgemental and bigoted and sort of boring and that is why many men prefer ts females. I've noticed that genetic women often have a hard time intellectually understanding what gender is and they seem to get all tangled in the physical issues. I think women need to wake up and get more realistic about life, people and the world we all live in. Many women just seem to be totally unrealistic and out of touch...

  61. @ Sandy: You are a complete bigot and your old, out dated views are out of step with most educated and informed people--and of course, offensive. You need to get a life... Also, I would wonder about your own sexuality--you seem to be so insistant upon defining others, who you do not even know, strangely enough. I wonder if you are hiding something in your closet...

  62. @ Andi, another clueless woman. Strange that you should have a gender non specific name, since you're talking trash about ts women. And real women, fake women?? Are you serious with that? Hahaha. I would love to know what you know about being a "real" woman. You obviously know next to nothing about men, that's totally for sure. Just keep on thiking in that typically narrow and small minded way while the guy your with (if you even have one) continues to lie to you (women like you get lied to all the time by men) while he is on the DL with a TS woman---hahaha. You're so clueless. When will women wake up to the REALITIES of this world and to the REALITIES of men. Most of you know nothing about men yet behave as though you know everything about them. That's so funny...and very dangerous...

  63. I'm seeking a transsexual woman for a serious relationship.been single for months now, and have no desire to try another "biological" woman.

    Now why i wanna be with a non-op/pre-op transsexual woman is not something that i can answer easily.

    I don't find women interesting for anything other than sex.Now this might sound immature, but most men would agree with me that women are boring, silly, over-emotional, and not mentally stable especially during menstruation.I also happen to be a bi-curious male.Im not attracted to men, but i find "tranny" porn very arousing.

    I believe that transsexual women are not psychologically 100% female, because they have a male brain.
    All the gay men i know are feminine, and some of them act more feminine than your average woman.But that doesn't make them women does it?
    What this means is that transsexual women have a residual male psychology.This really makes me interested in having a relationship with one.

    All this combined should make a sense of why I want to be with a transsexual woman.

  64. This is truly an interesting flow of opinions.

    I'm a woman with a transsexual past and now live in Germany. I've transitioned while still in my teens (paused self-prescribed HRT time and again) and finally had the SRS in mid-2000.

    Even before the surgery, I neither ever used that male genitalia, nor had any sort of relationship with a female. I can claim knowing somehow how men's brains work but not from being "male" decades ago, but rather from the bulk of information that one can easily read around, and from closely observing men that I came across with.

    I believe it is not accurate to theorize that TS women have residual male traits. There are many genetic women who have these as well. Here in Germany where I now live, one would find so many genetic women who possess a tough-man-like character, as well as man-like physical attributes. If people think that TS-loving men get attracted to TS women with this notion in mind, it is merely because they are aware that TS women were formerly "male".

    Ever since I was kid (I'm originally from the Philippines), I had been raised to be a boy, but I naturally resisted and acted, felt, talked, and thought just like any genetic girl. I had crushes on male classmates, fell in love many times, and dreamed of one day becoming the woman I've always been inside, and getting married to a man who'd love me and I'd love for a lifetime.

    These two dreams I have now somehow fulfilled, except that the man to whom I am now married does not love me and treats me ill. But being a traditional-minded woman, I still hold on to this marriage, hoping that one day, he would learn to love me. You might ask, "why did he marry you if he didn't love you?" I think it's because he was fascinated by my intelligence, my strength, my charm, and by the idea that a woman such as I was able to rise above the stereotyped TS (I had a good office job at a reputable firm in the Middle East).

    But then, reality strikes when two people live together. In my own right, I know that I'm beautiful and attractive. But he started focusing on my shortcomings as a person, compares me to a genetic woman, and expected exceedingly too much when and where I could already hardly cope up with them.

    Now, he has another relationship, with a genetic woman.

    It's sad when men choose TS women to be their partners without first thinking deeply about the consequences that such a relationship would bring.

    I pass as a woman by all intents and purposes, and I currently hold a job at an airport here, as a woman. I am the lead singer in 2 rockbands here, and deal with all people as a woman in every single way.

    If a man decides to enter a relationship with a TS woman, he should stop defining her and stop comparing her to a genetic one, but rather, just see her as a person that he has chosen as his partner. If you want to fall in love with a person, why do you have to know the difference?

  65. .... on Adrean's comment: "...I believe that transsexual women are not psychologically 100% female, because they have a male brain.
    All the gay men i know are feminine, and some of them act more feminine than your average woman.But that doesn't make them women does it?..."

    A transsexual woman's brain is female. there is a part in our brain that determines that. You may read this: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Causes_of_transsexualism#Brain_structure

    By the way, here is my comment on the messages about men getting turned on by TS women...

    Please try to see TS women in a normal light. It is understandable that so many men see them as sex objects due to the proliferation of TS-featured pornography. However, that is not the entirety of the TS population. There are so many TS women who hold regular jobs, have normal dealings in society, and who you come across with unknowingly. Most TS women have endeavored so hard to be the women they now are, not to be another item on a sex-crazed man's menu.

  66. ... and by the way... to the so-called genetic women who come in here posting harsh statements against TS women:

    - You should realize that NOT ALL genetic women can give children to their men. So if reproduction is the only reason why males and females are created, what do you make out of those who cannot bear children?

    - Not all women are able to menstruate. There are women whose ovaries and other genital parts removed due to illness. Are they no longer women?

    - "TS Women are not accepted in society..." Oh well, there are those who are not, and there are those who are. You will surely be shocked to find out that this is true. Many have decent, high-profile jobs and positions, and MOST are highly intelligent.

    - "Men who prefer TS women are sexist..." They are not. That is merely your own definition of it.

    You laugh at and ridicule TS women as though you were on a higher level. However, the truth is, there are so many TS women who have partners, who are looked up upon, and who make good life partners.

    Taking into account all of the negative and harsh comments by the self-proclaimed genetic women, don't you women think that your attitude simply reflects a sour personality? Maybe because you feel threatened? Maybe you exhibit your anger out of a feeling of despair and feeling lower than TS women? By your attitude, you have all the more proven that TS women are your equal, JUST AS ANY OTHER PERSON, regardless of sex or gender, CAN BE equal with another.

  67. All of you who said that if a man is into ts women, he has to have some bi or gay thing going on... Well, let's take a couple of lesbians where one is ts. Is that other one then automatically straight? Since she is with someone who used to be a "man"?

  68. It is highly helpful for me. Huge thumbs up for this website post!

  69. I think that most men who prefer transgender women are only looking for sex. There are some men who genuinely like the transgender women, but the majority are just in it for sex. The assumption of that majority is that the reason these women transitioned is just so that men can have sex with them.

    For the few men who are genuinely interested in transgender women, they are interested in all women. However, they seem to like transgender women better because transgender women are not bitchy or bossy or expecting privilege based on their female gender.

    Most genetic women grow up with people doing extra special things for them. A little boy growing up does not get all the special treatment that little girls growing up do.

    The transwomen had to live life of struggles for most of their lives. First with being treated badly for being boys. Then going through the difficulties of transition. That makes transwomen grateful for the things they have. They are humble. A lot more humble than genetic women.

    Genetic women have a reason for that lack of humility and lack of attachment to femininity. The lack of humility and gratefulness comes from being treated like special creatures. However, this benevolent sexism in favor of genetic women comes with the bad sexism which prevents these same genetic women from getting good jobs, getting paid well, etc. The contradictory treatment really makes genetic women expect a lot more than they get from life.

    So while genetic women view their natural femininity as a burden, transwomen cherish it. That makes a huge difference in their attitudes and behavior.

    Most transwomen are only as sexual as genetic women. In fact, transwomen tend to use medicines to block their testosterone. They end up having even less testosterone than genetic women. That results in lower libido. So transwomen are not more sexual. They are just more humble and open-minded and understanding. A tough life makes you like that!

    Of course, there are exceptions to all of the above. My statements above are about the average transwomen, average genetic women, and average men.

  70. Forgot to add a point to my post above -

    Attractiveness of a person is more than just in their appearance. There's more to a person than their body. That's where most transwomen seem to trump genetic women. And I'm talking about the men who genuinely like transwomen for more than just sex.

  71. I'm a straight male, divorced 3 times. After the 3rd one I figured out I had to stop finding the same type of woman. Instead I went completely out of character and was picking up two woman a nite when I would go out. I'm not sure if I was more disgusted with them or myself.
    Then I met a gourgous ts and fell head over heels! She was preop so I was nervous about what would go down. I found it to be natural and sensual. I'm not bi or gay in my mind. I found that I like woman who understand me. I like smart woman that take care of themselves.
    I was and still am concerned about family/ friends giving a negative reaction. I have told some knowing that they will diseminated a filtered version of the situation. As for the sex, my favorite part is hugging her. With all the woman before it was getting them out of my bed when done. You,re the expert, you tell me what I got into. I don't even look twice at a gg anymore.

  72. Very good, I'm impressed! I read every word above and appreciated the extremely polar points of view. None of your views could have been expressed 21 years ago when I first came out at night in a dress and started dating guys.

    FYI In my readings I've noticed that ALL men were bisexual before 350 years ago on all continents. "Sex in history" written by Reay Tannahill.

    The reason I found this blog tonight is due to my curiosity for why so many men up to 33 years my junior were replying to my profiles on various dating sites.

    I assumed only the mature 52 year olds like myself would want to date me. So I asked most of them prior to our first date "Why me? I'm probablly older than your mother. Are you into a kinky mother thing with me?"

    Their answers totally astounded me! The following is a mix of approximately 6 men whose ages range from 19 to 38 years old.

    "Your age is not important. I like how you look dressed up. I liked your profile answers. I wanted to learn about sex from an experienced TS. My sex life so far with biological females my age sucks! I'm just not dating anymore because they make me feel shitty because I'm still in college studing IT."

    "Genetic girls don't understand me at all. One dated my best friend right after me and told him I'm bad in bed. I would never do that to anyone."

    "Our first date felt like it was a job interview, there wasn't any romance. My first TS girlfriend was the most romantic girl I ever dated."

    "On our first date she wanted to pay for dinner when I realized I left my wallet in the car. I so was embarassed but she made me feel it was cool. Later that night we laughed about it while making love. Best sex I've ever had. GGs are never that cool about money."

    "I'll never date real chicks again, they are too into their own little world of girl gossip. Who cares what Hollywood person just got dumped. What does that trash have to do with future of the world. When they ask a question like which electric car is going to be the least expensive to drive on a long trip they aren't interested in the the answer."

    "She always compared me and my stuff to all her girlfriends guys cars, ab muscles, jobs everything. I just didn't want to be in her contest anymore. I didn't say that girl is more awesome looking than her?"

    There is lot more that I learned but I don't want ot bore you!!!

    My point: I'm a little worried about this younger generation that is becoming aloof to the opposite gender. What happened to romance?

    Money and statis isn't everything girls. I don't need the top designer brand clothes and bags to feel sexy/pretty. I don't need the tallest guy, I'm 6'0" plus 3" heels. I happily settle for guys 5'10" and above.

    Start looking at what is "right" with the guy who is attracted to you and be thrilled with him or these Tgirls like me will end up with all your men!

    It's always been a competitive world so fall in love long before you start to look like crap at 40 plus or you will feel all alone.

    ps I hike 5 miles per night and mountain bike in the hills to have great legs and ass at 52 y/o. Remember we tgurls have 10 to 20 times the testosterone than you have for horniness. When we add some estrogen for better skin and growing boobs we become a pretty awesome opponent.

    pps Some guys are marrying Russian girls now. You HAD the home court advantage. Why are you throwing it away? Better put on your roller blades soon!

  73. To Vicki:

    I find it is ridiculously funny how you use those quotes from a male, that generalized EVERY genetic woman, assuming we only care about a man's status, money, and comparing other guys material worth to our own men. That guy was dealing with immature girls who is superficial but that does not mean ALL biological women are like that.

    It's nice how he boosted up your ego and you couldn't stop him in is tracks and tell him not every woman have that mindset but I guess you couldn't because you believe somehow you are better than us. Oops... I forgot you couldn't because you really isn't a genetically born female. I find it odd that a transgender woman like yourself demand to be identify and label as a lady and be part of womanhood yet boast how you all are taking all the men away from us! Who's US? I thought you guys were women now? Why the separatism? Where's the female unity, WOMAN?

    Just to let you know, this 29 year old genetic woman don't need to be schooled by another "woman" on how get a man. Thanks to my mom, I know how to treat a man very well; plus I got a great catch, a wonderful man I will marry soon and have babies by in the near future.

  74. Its interesting that you mentioned that we as Transgendered women who used to be men would seem to understand straight or Bisexual males. All of the writers have written eloquent reasons why this is so, but from a practical point of view, which is my own; I would say that being a Transgendered woman gives you a look into both sides of the gender debate.

    I am a Filipina American who was born in the US, During my pre-conversion stage, I was in the Military, retired as a Police Officer, and did many things that would be of interest to many males. Even after my transition, I continue to play in games that many young and older men are in, which makes me a bit different than many women.

    Even though I can dress down and not wear make-up, I can make a stunning figure in jeans, military clothing, and even in a dress and heels. So I guess that being does make us more inviting to many older men who are not looking for a family, but want someone to share their lives.....

  75. Jessica, you are a very unintelligent person with a lot of hate and jealousy inside you. Gender is determined in the brain and sometimes in the chromosomes. I have a variant in my chromosomes where the Y looks a little like a K so I am female in my brain. There is every manner of existence in this world. There are many variations of both the males and females just like all the mutations in the animal kingdom. You poor, poor stupid girl. I feel sorry for you because you are very ugly inside.

  76. In an attempt to quell the debate and offer some sanity and insight, here are my two cents:

    First, the definition of transgender implies that there is a transcendence over the typical ideals of gender binary. In that the philosophy and ideals of being transgendered is something can overcomes simply being male or female, because a trans "male" or "female" is essentially rejecting the given genders and is applying a gender identity that is suitable to them and is more often than not a completely new gender philosophy itself.

    So with this in mind, it is inaccurate to even bring up "real" and "fake" women, and to compare trans women against biological women - which are not even "two totally different things" but an infinite number of different examples.

    In essence, the two share a similar philosophy of gender identity, which is something separate from an individuals' biology. As such, you realize that gender identity is a spectrum as opposed to a question of exclusively male or female and feeling as if someone has to assimilate to a set standard. In this way, trans women are not trying to "emulate" or "become" women, they are simply creating their own gender identity that shares feminine traits of the spectrum.

    In the same way, women do not all identify as one strict idea of "female" in terms of their gender identity.

    Think of it this way: as humans, we all share the same mental capacities and are undoubtably equal. What separates all humans from being "the same" (not unequal, mind you) is that our brains inhabit differing vessels a.k.a bodies. The bodies that we inhabit affect our psychology, though if we are to be truly liberated human beings we must realize the equality of sexes. In the same way, it is trivial to

    It doesn't matter what sexual orientation you describe yourself as, a "straight" man is different from a "gay" man, but is he different from a man who has romantic and/or sexual feelings towards a trans woman, or a woman who gender bends? What if a man is attracted to a woman who tries to look like a man, but is genetically a woman? Is it different from being attracted to a "man" who looks like a female? Or a transgendered individual?

    To me, in the grand scheme of things it's all rather trivial and doesn't matter AT ALL.
    It's impossible to discuss issues that go outside of gender binary with an analytical perspective of only two genders, if you get what I mean. In other words, our modern understandings of sexual orientation, gender identity, and sex are those of a spectrum - where there is no absolute black and white and there is only a sea of grey. Because our terminology that we're working with doesn't reflect that, it's impossible to discuss it, and we're just meaninglessly getting angry at each other as if we were speaking two different languages or not having the same understanding.

    I hope you guys find this insightful, good day loves <3
    (and in case you're wondering, I'm a 19 year old "pre-op" trans girl with no intentions of transitioning or taking hormones. So what does that make me then? To me there is no definition, I am simply who I am).

  77. I have bin dating a trans sexual woman for a couple of months now. She was my first, we have a good time to gether, she is very exotic looking and far more a freak in the bedroom then I have experienced with gw. and I like the attention we get from the public, but to be honest. I miss vagina i like her but I just don't think I can handle. Not having it anymore is this something I can learn to deal with.. She wants a sex change but who knows when that will be.

  78. Why Do Straight Men Love Transgendered Women ?

    Why do so many straight men want to have sex with transgendered women? I have thought about this for years and it boils down to this: We LOVE being women more .... much more!... and we do not take our femininity for granted the way so many genetic women do. And THAT is what turns men on the most... The "Look at me; I'm sexy!" attitude that their wives have lost. He is afraid of the whole homo-thing of course... but quite needlessly so. I have found that the men who date me are more courageous and masculine and loving of sexy women than anyone who would not or could not love a special lady. (I avoid gay-bi peenee weenee chasers like the plague, however, because THAT is insulting both to me and to my suffered-for and hard-won femininity.)

    When a married man comes to me because I love to wear lipstick and nail polish and lacy underwear and nylons and high heels and long hair with ribbons and bows as I flirt and smile and tease... I know he is cheating and I hate to be a part of all that... BUT I also know that his desire is so very intense and it goes right to the very depths of his soul. The greatest compliment that I have ever received have been from men who say that I make them feel more like a man than any other woman ever has. And the most satisfying thing to me is to nurture his deep desire and to satisfy his deepest longings in ways that no other woman ever has... the way a loving mother tenderly feeds and nurtures a hungry child. To me Nurturing IS the very essense of femininity and it defines me as a woman, fulfills my desires, and satisfies the deepest longings in my soul as well.

    Just so we understand each other.... I choose to identify myself as a Straight Woman and I identify with straight women... NOT as TVCDTGTSTVCDTG... I NEVER ever wanted to be one of those... just a girl. So my desire for a man is... only as a woman... I cannot stand gay or bisexual activity or top-bottom talk (yuk... actually sickens me). That stuff is just not for me. I also do not wish to be with GG women or TG women (who are ALL women and sisters to me anyway). I only date straight men who love women... preferably he has never even been with TG women before either. I am very romantic and actually kind of old fashioned too in many ways. I just Love to Kiss and tease and flirt and make love as a woman... doing only the things that women do (only better of course teeheehee) but only with a man who Loves only women.

    That is what works for me. (BUT, yes of course, I do see how many might consider ALL of this stuff to be gay or queer or bi or something like that... but my fantasy and my reality is only as an old fashioned romantic feminine girl who loves to be loved by a masculine straight man who loves only sexy women and sees me as one. THAT is my story and I am sticking to it! Teeheehee! Hugs darling! Love, Your Suzi

    ========================

    I have always kind of quizzed the fellas who ask me out... more of a test really... to see if their interest is more in the penis that they think I may or may not have (Teeheehee!) or in the Lady/Woman/Girl that I present and wish to be wanted for.

    If the penis holds low or moderate interest to them, I will date them. But if penis is their primary interest or major focus, then I drop them like a hot potato because they are more gay or bisexual than interested in my femininity and that turns me right off right away.

    In fact... I find it insulting and disappointing to be wanted for that reason. My femininity must always come first in their desires. The honoring of a woman's (femininity or a man's masculinity) is the very essense of Chivalry. And in my case anyway... is what will, in fact, make the wildest dreams come true for a gentleman who really loves women... and my dreams will come true as well.

    Please do not love me or want me BECAUSE I am transgendered. Love me in spite of it.

    (Similarly do not ever tell a fat girl that you love her or want her because she is fat... even if it is true... she does not want to hear it or to be loved or wanted for that reason. See?)

    Why Do Straight Men Love Transgendered Women ?

    https://www.facebook.com/#!/notes/candace-suzanne/why-do-straight-men-love-transgendered-women-/251411684928885

  79. im a 100% female and i think transgender women are beautiful,but why do the guys on here sound like were not capable of being girly,but men are not mannly all day 24/7.i love men but men act like they are the fantasy man that every women wants,trans gals have big butts,boobs,long legs etc things men love but how many men are tall,handsome,bulid strong manly body,sexy and have a big dick ......im no bashing men im just saying.im sexy as fuck and totally girly,love to be one.love to cook and clean,dnt nag or force girl talk,want my space and loves a man to be a man and be in control but i cant be a diva all the time(even thu i wud) sometimes i have to dress dwn but i can totally see why men like them plus trans women to men are super fucking hottt to have pussies i love men but i can see a tranny man being a better man then a real one and theyer alot hotter{ i dnt knw why but they do]

  80. i have recently discovered that a man that i have fell in love with is bi-sexual i discovered this on his website that he thought was hiddened he passes as bi & agnostic and with further investigation he regularly frequent craigslist to solicit sex with men he like to give and receive head. also on his facebook he is friends with a well known tranny. he will not say anything to me a bout this so that we can discuss this situation which complicates our relationship.he is currently in jail and will be out soon..he is also still in touch with his ex-girlfriend whom i believes knows about his bi-sexuality..he is still talking about being with me when he is out and getting married..but i'm having "obvious" doubts about being with him other than for mere friendship...sad & depressed what should i do? should i confront him or not say anything and just end the relationship?

  81. just have to say as a transwoman who hardly ever wears makeup never has problems passing. and oh wouldnt date a man if u paid me. im a single mother of 2 (thier bio mom passed away) i work full time go to school online. own 1 dress and my only excessively girly atribute is the fact that i love my shoes. oh and on the chromosomal thing i have 2 x's i also have a y. so im xxy. thus someone explain to me what i supposedly am.

  82. doesn't matter AT ALL ??????

    thats redicilous to say -

    they do anal sex - thats why !
    most women don't.

    simple

    Its typical respectless to compare trangender with real women.
    Even if a real woman does anal sex - she is much better than a transgender.

    sorry

  83. a man better listens to Eckhart tolle and changes if he wants to be understood.usually the average of all men is a lazy bunch and unwilling to work on themselves.Stupid men !

  84. intercourse, I`m also talking about relationships and emotional connection.

    Intercourse is the emotional connection

    its built on sex thats all and its a sort of a perversion to think that they are better than real women.Its the homosexual scene that degrades real women everywhere - just have a look at fashion - !!!

    if they were connected to their own true being
    they wouldn't need to be trans - gendered -

  85. As a transgendered woman -- very pre-op, not even on hormones -- I agree with much of what the author says. I try to make myself as feminine and attractive to men as I can, since that is my orientation. But I'll tell you something that really bothers me. When I go out with a man, I want him to desire me as a woman -- even if I still have male genitalia. What I DON'T WANT is for the man I'm with to want me to be dominant and to penetrate him. First of all, it's difficult for me to do this with erectile dysfunction; and would be even more so if I was on hormones. Secondly, I am the one who wants to be penetrated. But I see so many ads in magazines and on sex sites showing 'she-males' (I HATE that word!) possessing huge breasts AND a huge penis! This apparently is many a man's fantasy: so that the woman can 'do' him. But that's not me: and it's not, I suspect, what most transsexuals are or want to be.

  86. Hi, so i've been reading this book called gender outlaws, it was written by kate bornstien, in brief description she says that she use to be a hetero male who is now a transgendered lesbian, who lives with her partner that is transitioning to be a man, this line totally blew my mind because like most ignorant people i used to believe that transgender means that you changed your sex because you felt more like the opposite sex because you were gay. her story is a real eye opener for me because she states that she always had feelings for women, and that men dont do it for her, however in time she realized that she need to be true with herself, and thats why she can be in the type of relationship shes in.

    thats not reason for my comment i just wanted to throw that out there so ignorant people can understand, that gender just like race is a lable that some people feel they need to identify each other with, at the end of the day we are all only human.

    this is my story im at bar i had a few drinks i was buzzed, but very aware of my surroundings, in walks the most prettiest asian woman i have ever seen, confidently i walk up to her, next thing you know laughing, having a good time a couple hours go by and then she ask me to come back to her place, now im super excited i WAS 21 YEARS OLD, and i had never been laid. so now im super juiced i was thinking im finally gonna do this, so when i get to her bedroom were touching and kissing, and that point in time i was harder then than solving a calculus problem "hope that's not to x-rated" now im ready see whats in between, as she removes her cloths she cuts off the lights, the red flag should have went off then, but i was horny and mislead by this beautiful liar. i had sex with her and i did enjoy it i must say, so now im thinking of how lucky i am to have found someone; even tho i'm considered to be an extremely good looking fellow being the Americas next top nerd doesn't get u as much play as you think it would. when i found out that she was a Transgendered i was in a state of shock, out of misunderstanding i broke it off, because in my mind i felt tricked, i felt like i had won a gold medal that was stripped a way due to a technicality, I never saw her since, but since then i have been in a few relationships with natural born women, and the sex is good but i dont get the gratifying feeling i felt when i was with that transgendered woman, i want to have a wife and kids, but for some strange reason i now have a disire to be with transgendered women, and thats putting a big damper on my sex drive, the other day i was with one of my friends and she really wanted to have sex, me being a man im not gonna turn down sex, especailly with a woman as fine as her, however during intercourse i couldnt keep it up, now im 25 years old, i should not be having that kinda problem yet. but i think it has something to do with me wanting to be with transgendered woman. this is the thing though im not gay, im not bi , i dont find straight or gay men attractive. i have a disire to be with women weather they be natural or transitional. other people would label me as bi-sexual but the problem i have is not sexual, its psychological, my brother is openly bi he likes men and women, for me its just women, but now im confused and i dont know what to do, if i ever told any of my family members, or friends they just wouldnt understand, i know they accept my brother and love and support him , but for me they would be shocked, i regret the situation of being mislead, but i don't regret doing it , but at the back of my mind im bothered because i think that being with a transgender woman is wrong, but that's only because of norms in human society, i believe in god, however i believe in man, and man makes the rules not god, i want to be happy with my feeling, yet in the back of my mind dating or fooling around with a transgendered woman is not what i want for my future, but destiny might prove otherwise, and im not a chaser of transgenders, but i have taken notice to how many of them there actually are and my curiosity a very human emotion is besting me. what should i do? that's hypothetical question i already know the answer too, but i still would like to know what others think on this subject

  87. How could some of these so called "straight men" have a dick in their mouth and their ass everyday and still swear on their mother's graves that they are 100% straight. If I eat pussy everyday, can I still claim that I am a staight women?????

  88. TO TINA: you do know their are women who swear their straight but have sex with women and they prefer and more frequent and think they are straight, but still call themselves straight because they are emotionally attracted to men. makes no sense right. at least this is different, this can confuse a hetero guy.

  89. I've read all the comments here in full, and have found this post question/answer session by so many to be very interesting to me. As well as being an eye opener for me! Let me keep this response to the point of only what I understand, and explain where I'm coming from ok?

    For myself, I've had bisexual experiences when I was much younger in my late teens, and early 20's. I've been married twice, with one lasting 25 yrs., and over times of struggle marriage started to go a different path. My wife was familiar with my past, but I never looked to be with a man since my getting married, and it was only for the sake of bedroom talk it would ever come up. As the marriage soured over time I was accused by my wife that being with men was my interest, and it couldn't have been farther from the truth, as I LOVE Women! I will admit, in the bedroom anything is acceptable to me with no qualms about men / women actions or discussions on the topic of sex. However, in my relationships outwardly I find I'm more conservative or traditional to what I've searched for in fulfilling my life objectives, and having my marriage with raising a family fit just perfect for me.

    Now to the main story, over the last 2 1/2 years I have form a solid relationship with a much younger lady 27 yrs. my junior. She fit every criteria that I as a man wanted in a woman who would be my future wife in every sense of the word - My Dream Woman! I always would tell my co-workers and closest of family and friends just how specially different, caring, sensitive, and the most expressively loving individual you could ever meet. Above all, she is so very beautiful both on the outside, and on the inside - She's a complete package! Now here we go, we have formed this daily, weekly communication over this long period of time, never meeting each other due to distance afar, but have connected on a such a level with the most respect to one another one could enjoy. I've supported her financially monthly to meet her needs to better her life to uplift her and show her love, and in return she has paid me with a love NO AMOUNT OF MONEY COULD BUY! She's RICH in Love! Just what a man wants right? Recently, checking one thing out on general information about her that wasn't in question, but after learning about it I found that there could be a double life of some kind going on. Now, I'm thinking this whole time, that this is just another cheating on your husband or partner thing right? Wrong!!! What I found was a secondary site where the common people corresponding with her were LadyBoys in Asia, where she is from, as I'm from the U.S. Just so you know, I have future business dealings that will relocate over there soon, so that's why her and I were together during this time. Long story short, I confronted her, by explaining to me what the hell is going on. She confessed that she was a LadyBoy, and that she had not disclosed this thinking I would leave her, as I was looking for a woman. I was Shocked, and all the confusing thoughts have come over me at one time. Due to her circumstances of poverty, and raising her standard of living with the hopes in time she could tell me, and we would deal with it later, this came as a surprise to her that I found out. She just had to confirm to me this is true! After discussing this, we're still together for now at least, and I told her that I accept her for who she is, but wished that she would have given me a choice, as I'm looking for a WOMAN! So to deal with this, she opened up to me that she is a pre-op but isn't on hormones, but has always wanted to be a woman in every way, and would love to go through the transition, especially if it would make the difference to meet what I desire to be with a woman without the "extra stuff below". You see for me I relate to "RockDiva's" cooments to the location of the PI, and also "Charlie Brown" being tricked, and the feelings he has now. I have NEVER in my life experienced the feelings of the love this woman possesses and expresses to me on a daily basis, and there is definitely a difference, but I think it's the person of who "They" are, whether they're GG or TS/TG. If being a TS brings out these inner feelings compared to a GG, that can be felt so strong like these other men have stated, then this is a perfect love, and I love the person she is man or woman. In our case, sex hasn't been involved, and I have never thought about being with a TS, and I've seen TS porn, but to me all porn is equal to a degree. But what I'm saying is, it's the depth of the feelings of TS individuals about their feminity that separates them from GG women, and that is now obvious to me with this newly found information. I just hope in time that I can handle my own struggles with this, as it raises a whole different set of questions for me to deal with, and she is well set in her life as a TS, but our lives are now intertwined, and most men would have left her on the spot, but I'm not that type of guy! So we'll see what destiny has for us going forward! I did mention to her that only if she wanted the operation would I pay for it, as this would be a personal decision for her only. She says that would be her dream! I guess then, I would have the complete package then huh? I just need to deal with these confusing thoughts I'm going through - Still IN SHOCK!

    Thanks All for reading, and allowing me to say what's up! I for one, would stand up to anyone criticizing these TS folks, or any group. Show some decent human respect for others, and learn to be more tolerant, and accept that people are different within the world!

    Thanks Again,

    Confused?

  90. @YEAH BABY wish there were more GG women like you, you sound really cool.. I have only started transitioning but was starting to feel very disilusioned because of my research on how lesbians and bi women feel about ts women was all very daunting,esp as i adore the female form and persona & am not the slightest bit attracted to the male. I enjoy seeing myself as feminine and gracefull and really dislike the dude staring back at me in the mirror. anyhoo just wanna say THANKS! you've made me feel there is hope,that dreams can come true.x

  91. I've been on hormones for the last two years as of next Sunday. Yay. Though going through the process of being transgender and transsexual, I've found somewhat daunting, yet satisfying. People often tell me that everything on the inside is all that counts, but tell that to someone who does not posses the beauty and grace of a real woman. I lived most of my life as a cisgender straight male (though kind of a weirdo type -- believed in alot of unconventional ideas beyond the gender disorder), though most activities I participated in were normally male-centric (like sports, interests in nerdy hobbies, or working with hardware tools/building things).

    I fall into the pansexual category, and I've only recently dating men (in the last two years), but honestly I think my heart, soul, body, and matrimony will end up with a woman or another trans person. Regardless, if I were cisgender man, transwoman, or a woman, I've always had more natural chemistry with women (of any persuasion).

    Being with a man regardless of his sexuality or preferences, I always get the sense that it's of a very sexual nature and their attraction to me is heavily based on my physical appearance and how I possess the best qualities of both sexes, especially tran(ny)-chasers. Though, I guess with some my personality can shine over times, but I always feel like it is often unnatural and forced. It's weird, even though I've dated few guys over last 2-3 years. I always got the sense that I wasn't really attracted to them in the sense that they wanted me (mostly sexually and on a backburner).

    The one guy I had a crush on a Japanese man was so intense and unbearable at times, I didn't understand why at first. But realized, he embodied alot of qualities that most men seemingly lack. He treated me, like real woman, even though I was a transsexual. He wasn't consumed by my physical appearance -- what was hot and what was not and what I need to change. His social network sites had no hint of sexuality in them, no pictures of half-naked women or half-naked men, or holding random young men or women on his site, like a trophy case.

    Most of his pictures were never-ending visuals of nature and people. He captured pictures of mountains, oceans, landmarks, deserts, canyons, and people simply being people (smiling, working, having fun, and being sad). This man had irreplaceable personality - somewhat clumsy, goofy, doesn't take himself seriously, unassuming, sensitive and very cordial and nice). He would always say something goofy each day, or write these poems - that he always professes are clumsily written. But, if translated, they are some very beautiful poems and stories that he tells. To me, he has what I could describe as a "person with a beautiful soul." I love talking to him so much, even with language barrier. He was one of the first people to tell me, that I was a real woman, regardless (Most people aren't comforting to me like that if they know I am transsexual or see me as man pretending to be a woman). I sort of shed a tear that day.

    Even though, he was asexual, aromantic, and not interested in men or women, I still became very jealous and bitter. I felt like the one guy who was about something, who was special, and different from most men, did not want me in that way or even as something more than a mere, distant friend, only fun for a chat. My low self-esteem manifested even more, as I thought something was always wrong with me. I said the wrong thing to one of his friends, and lost my friendship with him, forever. . .

    (Trans) Chasers remain a unique bunch of men for a reason that fall into a category of being somewhat misogynistic or out of touch with modern women. Often, they will complain about how modern women do not want to be vulnerable or entirely submissive, do not doll-themselves up, do not want to cater to a man (or accept all of his shortcomings-coded language), moralistic, and does not enjoy doing more womanly things, like my mother and grandmother did. With chasers, there comes a certain stereotype sometimes, in which they are looking for this fashionable, yet old-fashion sexpot with a body like a supermodel or video-vixen. I felt like it's sort of weird, because there are alot of cisgender women who fit that role who personally know and estimate do exist in the general population. Unequally yoked, such woman is probably not going to want a man who socially maladjusted, mediocre in appearance and personality/empathy, and absolutely boring as person. What makes you think a trans woman with or without the cocktail is going to desire you?

    The biggest thing I see . . . are these men worthy of that type of woman. Only fate could determine that, but these type of women are clearly not pursuing them or interested in these type of men for some reason. Simply right cisgender women off as gold-diggers, opportunists, shallow-fake or being unlady like. Oddly enough, the same judgment that one can make about cisgender women (or men) can also be true for transsexual women (or men). I've never known any gender to produce a perfect grade of people in my entire life.

    More times than not, I also feel like chasers sometimes pursue tgirls, because of a victim complex of sorts, like it is an easy target, yet socially challenging because tgirls can beautiful and exotic though shun by society. It's exciting (for them). Oddly enough, unlike most people, I do not see myself from being completely different from any cisgender woman, except in the matter of having a male genitalia and masculine characteristics, yet I can point to many women who have masculine characteristics, personals, or features and it doesn't make them any less of a woman.

    If man simply desires a chick with a dick, simply he's bisexual. I know T-girls are fabulous and all, but you cannot tell that there are no cisgender women out there who do not possess that kind of flair and style for femininity, fashion, elegance and even do not mind catering to a man. Being in such big city, like Atlanta, it seems like it's fashion show just about any place you go, you are bound to see handful of flamboyant women walking proudly down the street.

    With most ordinary straight-bi-gay guys, I get the sense that I am some sort of abomination or a walking, meals-on-wheels prostitute who is hormonal for some straight manly cock. In reality, I feel like penises are kind gross and nasty, along with the way alot of men express themselves to me (and other women, both trans and cis).

    Personally, I often find it weird when I tell people that I am not attracted to men ... SHOCK. "You are supposed to be attracted to men, like most transsexuals or bi/gay men." How is that possible. "Why don't you like men, more?" "If you don't like men, why are transitioning, you can stay a man and get women." "To feel like a woman, don't you have to desire a man." "Well, don't you get to have alot of sex with men, looking like that, why would you look like that and want to be with women, I don't understand."

    These quotes fly at me from family members, friends, acquaintances, co-workers, random strangers (flirting with me), and others. It shows general ignorance about not only transgender/transsexuals in society, but also sexuality in general and its fluidity. Moreover, what really gets on my nerve is people telling me what I am or what I am supposed to be. If you refer to me as a gay man, or female impersonator, or a himsirbrodude, don't expect me to act cordially or even pay attention to what you have to say. Because, you are being blatantly rude to me, while I am treating you with respect. If you cannot understand what transgenderism or gender disorders are, then I can only help you by giving you literature or encouragement for more research beyond the typical Jerry Springer episode or cheesy storylines that appear in movies and TV shows about transsexuals and their horribleness nature to trap unsuspecting straight men into sexual tryst. I dress beautiful, because I feel beautiful, not because I am trying to gain approval into society, especially for a man. Patriarchy (and Masculine dominance) never ceases to rear its ugly head in every facet of life. Yes, I've always been a feminist of sorts.

    Being with a woman regardless of her sexuality or preference. It's always about how I am as person, what do I like to do, what do I do for a living, how well I can carry conversation, how much empathy can I show towards her and others, show some form of intelligence, and basic chemistry. Again, I think I am an ok looking woman (and I guess fairly passable with or without makeup) . . . I get attention from the opposite sex ... the lower rungs of it, anyway.

    Over the course of my life, I've only been attracted to women mostly as friends, sex partners, and dating partners. Generally, I've never been sexually attracted to men, unless I am starting to like him or falling in love with him. Out of the blue, I am not attracted to most men, physically, personality wise, the way they express themselves, or supposed to act in company of people, especially women. It's not say I won't love or marry a man, but he has to be different from most guys, at least to me.

    I've thought about cosmetic surgery (especially my nose, breast enhancement, and ear shaping), earlier. Now, I've gotten to the point of why would I do that? At the time, I struggled with self-image, because of the way my exes (one boyfriend and two flings). The ex I had longest relationship with, always expressed dissatisfaction in my cup size, which at the time was AA/A cup. I loved busty women and longer hair (my hair was alot shorter at the time, 2010). I was obsessed with it, even as I thought about my first fling who finally came to realization that it wasn't my apprehension to go out into public that kept us from dating - it was his perception that people might perceive me as a man and he didn't feel comfortable going out with someone like that.

    People often say that I was too beautiful to let people destroy my nature, like that. I often harped on saying something is one thing, someone doing something is another. My exes showed distaste in me, by cheating me and down grading me, yet as a trans woman I've never had anyone actually offer to give me the world, much less a nice dinner date (except for three women, two friends and one interested party). I sort of felt like I needed to get a breast surgery, maybe some other minor surgeries to really get someone to engage me as a realistic partner/spouse or give some more magical moments in life. Over time, I've found out enhancing certain body parts does not give you better things in life or substantial things.

    Truth be told, I am sort of happy being single (been single since late 2010), love the freedom and not being attached to unworthy, cheating, money-hungry, or abusive lover. Most of all, I am not settling for the all-too often placed role of a side piece or jumpoff that is much too familiar appearing with younger black women, young transwomen, and hell alot of young women in general. Honestly, I want the best things in life -- loyalty, respect, assurance, chemistry, openness, and fun from companionship. I do not want money, possession, or status from partners, I simply desire someone who will be there for me when the lava is at my feet (or theirs) and someone who is not afraid to say "I love you," in public or in private.

    P.S. Right now, I am admiring girl from Agnes Scott who is damn sweetheart and intelligent to a boot. She has long light brown hair, wears these with a sixties styled orange glasses, waif in appearance (not curvy at all), pale skin, and she's such a beautiful person to me. I hope I am not getting my hopes up again, but if this is the one I will be so happy.

  92. I have read with interest the article and the posts that accompany it, some of which I found very enlightening, and which corrected some of my admitted ignorance on the topic. As a straight genetic female and the widowed mother of four boys, I find it very disturbing that so many people seem unable to live and let live. I feel that all human beings, of whatever gender or sexual orientation, have the absolute right to do whatever they want with their bodies, and that includes surgical modification, if that is what makes them happy and what brings their outer person more in line with their inner feelings. I also believe every human being has an absolute right to be loved and accepted for who they are, without the need to hide or the fear of being belittled or abused. I also realize this is idealistic, and that human beings can be and frequently are extremely cruel to each other, especially to those who are perceived as "different" in any way, because to many, "different" is simply another term for "wrong." Hopefully, education can alter some of these attitudes, but it will take time, and the bigots and haters we will probably always have among us.
    Addressing some of the issues raised, I can see how men might prefer ts women sometimes, as, though I value my female friends, I also tend to find a certain number of women ditsy, needy, boring, etc. Of course, those kinds of women rarely make it onto my "friends" list. But then, no group is completely homogeneous, and it is both dangerous and unproductive to try to put people into little boxes. As one of my favorite columnists, John Devore, once said, "we are all uniquely dorky snowflakes". I always had more male friends than female when growing up, because I had a broad range of interests, including history, politics, etc. Then again, so do many women, so I am hardly unique. I also was a bit of a tomboy, again, not uncommon for a girl growing up in the country. I did have a lot of trouble with people telling me "You can't do that, you're a girl!" and insisting I should be a nurse instead of a doctor, or a secretary instead of a lawyer. But I blame that on the era, not the men (and women) who said those things to me. They were the products of their own upbringing. Anyway, I never let that stop me from doing what I wanted to do, and in a silk dress and heels, to boot. (smiles) And nobody today should ever let the opinions of others control what they want to do and who they want to be, or how they choose to present themselves to the world. I could see that a TS woman might understand a man better, given that she had spent time being treated as a man, and could have shared interests and experiences (serving in the military, etc.) that the average genetic female might not have had. I was married for a long time and have 4 sons, and feel I understand men pretty well. At the end of the day, all human beings, male, female or transgendered, want the same thing - to be loved, respected and understood. No more, and certainly no less.
    On a side-note, I do find it very sad that the men who transition to women feel obliged to give up their penis, although I do understand that many of them are relieved to do so, as many women who transition to men are glad to give up menstruation, etc. I would not have minded giving up menstruation myself, at times... it really is amazingly annoying and inconvenient. But the penis is such a beautiful, amazing organ. However, I must confess (and I hope this does not offend anyone)that if I woke up tomorrow and found I had grown a penis overnight, I would not allow anyone to take it away from me... I have had so much fun playing with male bits over the years that I would be happy to have one of my own to play with. And no, I would not feel less of a woman for having it, and no I would not want to penetrate anybody with it. It would just be my "little bit extra", and any man who wanted to be with me would have to accept me with that or move along. Well, just an opinion from an older, rather over-educated woman who thinks that people should be valued for who they are as human beings, for their hearts and minds and hopes and fears and dreams, for their intelligence and compassion, not for how they look or whom they choose to sleep with.

  93. I've read almost each and every comment here. This leaves me with just one conclusion.

    To GGs TGs Men Bi Gay, in short everyone.

    You create your own world. Life your life as you want it to be. You were born fed with different thoughts and beliefs, but now you're grown up, you have the freedom of choice. You're choice to create you own life the way you want to live it without compromising anyone's welfare.

    I'm a TS woman and I understand all of these people here. We've got our own opinion in life, and we should respect each and everyone. But a piece of advice, if your don't have anything good to say, just keep it to yourself. Don't be such a hater.

    I used to write a blog about the life of a transgender, i mean my life. Sadly I stopped with all the bashing i got from some people,so i stopped writing.

    here are some archives if u wanna check it out.

    http://www.thetrannyinheels.blogspot.com

    Don't hate. Just love.

  94. I just finished reading the article and most of the posts here and i thought i'd better leave my opinion as to why i'm dating and been with a ts woman for almost a year now, and never felt happier.

    My background is Middle Eastern, and i spend most of my teenage years in my homeland in the middle east, Syria.And you wont find Transsexual women in that part of the world.During the last years i spend in the middle east, i developed a feeling or a sense of disgust and anger at women.Something i could never explain.I am straight.And as the other men mentioned in the posts, im not attracted to men, neither do i watch gay porn.

    I came to realize later on that i literally can't understand women.I could never understand why the women in the middle east breed like rabbits and sound so damn stupid and irritating.Well, the women here in Canada, where i live now and been living for many years are not that much different.

    It became obvious to me, a straight man, that i can't really share my life with a woman.I had no solution for this until i met this special woman.
    From the moment she approached and looked into my eyes, i could tell she's not a woman.She does look feminine and all passable.She a pre op, which i don't mind and actually prefer.She approached me and started talking to me and it was so flawless that we actually ended up talking for hours.After that, she invited me to her place where we had the best mind blowing sex i could ever dream for.

    I personally believe I;m blessed to have met her.I'm in love with her and she's all that makes me happy.

    For those men out there who are like me, give it a go. You have nothing to lose.

  95. I am a transgender woman, the men I usually date or get into relationships with are attracted to women, not men. It makes me feel accepted and loved as a woman. I will definitely do everything I can to devote myself to a man who treats and loves me as a woman and partner.

    Granted, there are gay guys out there with a fetish for CD and sometimes they see a transgendered woman as such. I will not date men like that as they just see me as a piece of meat and even worse, it feels like they still consider me a man even though I look NOTHING like one. I just haven't had the ability to get SRS yet so I am a "man" to them.

  96. hi everybody!

    ive read almost every comment here and just taught i would give my opinion on the matter.

    well ive been dating a transgendered girl for a while now and the reason i like her has nothing to do with her gender. the reason why i like her is because shes strong minded, self confident, smart and a wonderful person.

    the thing is that she was born a man does not matter to me at all because she is a woman in my eyes. this is also how i see all transgendered people if you feel you shouldhave been born a woman that is how i will see this person and viceversa

    because as long as we refuse to see people as human beeings and insted focus on grouping everyone into some kind of gender or sexuality or even etnity there will allways be hate for people who are differrent

    just take my advice be yourself and let others do the same ;)

  97. Hi, after reading the article and some of the comments, I thought I'd give you mine as well.

    First of all, as a Sociology student, I know/understand that, when it comes to 'male and female', there are two very different ways of classifying it.

    Number one, there is 'Sex', that is, who you are biologically, whether your genitals swing, etc. Typically, a male has a penis and the equipment that entails, and a female has a vagina and all that it entails. Biologically. Of course, I'm speaking of 'typical' cases, and while I know there are people born intersex/hermaphrodite (or whatever the proper term is) and am not trying to deny that, I'm gonna keep this simple and stick to 'typicals'.

    Number two, is 'Gender'. When we speak of what is 'manly' and 'womanly', 'masculine' and 'feminine', or what we consider typical of the biological classification in terms of personality traits, this is what we mean. Growing up, most likely you grew up treated a cetain way by your parent(s), and you'll have noticed it more if you have siblings of the opposite sex. In Western society, boys tend to be dressed in bold colours, given 'male-typical' toys like machines and dinosaurs and taught to be tough. Girls tend to be dressed in soft colours, given dolls, stuffed animals and toys that teach the joys of housework and taught to be empathetic - sensitive to the feelings of others.

    From the cradle, people are taught how to be a 'typical' member of their particular sex, and it's these values that permeate society, that tell us all what 'man' is and 'woman' is. They learn how they should (and later do) identify themselves in their head. Of course, these values differ from society to society, from area to area, but the ones outlined above are the most typical of Western society typical of such as the USA and UK in the most basic of ways.

    In short, 'Sex' describes what's 'down there', while 'Gender' describes what's 'up here', in your mind.

    That was what's typical of the cisgendered men and women. Now, we have a person, let's for argument's sake say a boy named... 'Tom'. Now, Tom has the whole male package 'down there', and on the outline seems a typical boy. However, on the inside, gender-wise, due to various reasons both nature and nurture, he believes he is 'she', a girl named (for argument's sake)... 'Maria' stuck inside this horrid boy's body. As far as Maria is concerned, what she has down there is nothing but a mistake, because her gender is female. Reader, Maria is transgendered, and if she has the right help and guidance, she will change her body and her sex to suit her gender.

    When we say who a woman is and who a man is, it depends, as with our sexuality, how we define ourselves. Just because a transwoman wasn't born biologically female doesn't make her any less female, the same with transmen and being male.

    Now, I may not be the best person to talk about this. My name is Ruin. I am not trans* (at least I don;t think I am), however, I am somewhat gender-fluid - sometimes I feel extremely girly, sometimes I feel extremely masculine, but often I fall between that scale. I sit here, and I do not feel so much one gender that I identify as it. As far as I'm concerned, I'm a 'me', and 'what God gave me' doesn't matter.
    What is more, I am bisexual in that I would have relationships with both men and women, but I suppose that isn't the 'correct term' - I am slightly more pansexual in that I would have a relationship with a trans* person (transman or transwoman) if they were the right person for me in terms of personality, but I am by no means a trans-chaser. It's like they say 'Genitals: You have them, we like them'.

    I think, if we are to fully understand the issues that trans* people face, we have to understand that there are ultimately two ways to look at what is 'male' and 'female', and infinitely more to a person than what they have downstairs.

    Also, Persona, the others are right: No transwoman 'used' to be a man - it is more, as I understand it, that she realises she was always a woman. This will then be followed by, if she's fortunate, a transition to become physically what she always was mentally - a pretty pretty girl.

  98. The damned thing that tires me out is biological woman judging on us, even they were born woman as the EASIEST way. Even I am a lesbian type, for 1% I can find a man great, REAL man having the GUTS in a taboo society to accept me and show equal chances boost my woman feelings to the sky : It sky-rockets it, although I cannot fall in love with a man, but I can damn play with them. Maybe giving one time a chance to see me naked, to develop their preferences in choosing a biological woman or a trangendered one. Nice article you have, but know once a man would get me : Saying you're looking good -> Will END the relationship. you know why ! No ?

  99. after being involved with many different therapy groups with male adults sexually abused as children by men, i find that a lot of them revisit the experience with TS women - they recreate their abuse. There are a lot of documented studies on this area. The published percentages of TS women who were sexually abused as little boys is high also. Just a thought, i know this one will set some of you off. I know that these reasons are not always the case, however it is another reason that some men like TS women.

  100. I LOVED this article! I met my boyfriend through http://www.tsdating.com. I read his profile before responding. He's a widower, and in his profile, he said the SAME thing! TG women have to try harder!

    I hope I can keep him! :)

  101. You're all rude horrible people, who see nothing in a womans worth but what she can provide for a man. It's the same old crap over and over. Be it the trans or the cis women here. You're all reactionary and crude to one another, all the while spouting that everyone is an idividual without even believing it.

    I am sick and tired of seeing that all women are this all women are that, just as much as I bet trans women are sick of being told who they are. I am not feminine in my dress all the time as I am sure trans women aren't either, you know why?? Because we are human beings and sometimes other things are more important.

    Now here are both sides of the coin big noting about which one is better?? Well to be honest with you none of you are better, you are all the same and you all follow the same old generalisations I thought I could get away from with people who understood about being typecast.

    The more I try to find people like me the more anti-social I become.

  102. I am a straigh male, and have a butyful trangender girlfrinde. I have had sevreal girlfrinds though, nothing like my transgender girl. In my opinion i like trangender women better because they understand, me they make a relashionship work regarldles, and they treat me like a king. I have had two transgenderd girlfrinds and never argued over nonsens,evrything fall into place. We have amazing intercourse,better than a so called woman wich i see no difrence. I am not into the male area and,bever have even been cerious. I stay away and act like nothing is there,for those asking and wondering about this. She know what she wants she alwaus makes time for me and looks like a model. She takes care of her self, and is very loving. A trangender women refrencing to my expiriaance. What els can a man ask for butyful understand classy, charming frindley and they do not act like there shit dont stink. Transgender women are amazing.

  103. one more thing i care less what the world or mand kind thinks. I am happy and wiil continue to with a classy good looking, good personality understanding Transgender women, that even though she dislikes fotball she will still watch it next to instead of thinking of shoping or going with there frindes. Not in a darogatory fashion towards women well at least the few good ones out there in the world.

  104. DEAR JESSICA,
    I am a transgender WOMAN and nothing less. You see, our "liberal" country has brainwashed Americans into beliving these absurd restrictions on gender, maybe you should research a bit more thoroughly. While I found a lot of what you said rather offensive about women of my kind, I do agree with a slim few of your opinions. Firstly, a TRANS identified woman could never be a genetic woman...duh!

    Secondly, transwomen can't bear children, yet, as well as many genetic women who can't bear children, its life. Get over it. I can't speak for all transwomen but no one taught mme how to strut in heels, it was a natural god given gift that a lot ofof genetic women don't have, I'm just saying. Women are women, trans or not, yes there are differences but there are also things in common that we all share.

    A man who is attracted to transgender women isn't sexist, he's another man with a preference just like any other man and sweetie there are plenty of men to go around so why argue about who gets what man? As for the children argument,some men want kids and some don't again, it is only a preference.

    As for "women rights"YOU are entitled to rights that women like myself are still fighting for. You got your rights as woman in the 50's and I'm still fighting for mine in 2012. The only way a transwoman is ever a threat to a genetic woman is when the genetic woman is unhappy with herself. We transwomen bust our butts to get things that you have had all of your life.

    You should be flattered that someone from my walk of life embraces your gender enough to attain it by all costs. It is women like you who make genetic women sound insecure, whether they are or not. I could go on and on but the truth of the matter is we are women. Women with a unique story and we should all be embracing each other because women come from all walk of life. Now, go pop out some more babies while I keep my body in shape and work on my adoption plan. Chow:)

  105. I am amazed at the number, and length, of replies.

    IF I were to remain as a guy, I would definitely prefer a Transgender 'woman'. I'm too old for kids (unfortunately) so that aspect isn't an issue.

    What does matter is that every Transgender (M-F) knows what a Guy wants and needs. We hear so much BS from (genetic) women about (a) what they think a Man needs and wants and (b) much more about what Women want. After the death of my female soulmate, I had a (female) Partner who understood me very well - better than I realised. I made the huge mistake of choosing a different 'lady'. That cost me £100,000 GBP. Then I 'teamed up' with another woman (Asian) who eventually took my liabilities to £250,000 GBP.

    Honestly, I was shocked at the vulgarity of female-female jokes in e-mails. Never again will I assume that a 'lady' is to be spared any vulgarity ! And (genetic) women mostly are SO CALCULATING and CUNNING !

    Give me a TS anyday !!

  106. As man in my 30's who is attracted to both transwomen and women I will explain why my preference leans more to transwomen.

    Both are feminine, however a transwomen adds to that with her genitalia - a penis. While a penis is the male genitalia it does not make the transwoman any less of a woman that she is. So all things being equal I prefer the transwomen genitalia over the female genitalia, female genitalia is nice too of course.

    Physically everything else is the similar, with exception of breasts as transwomen either have no, small hormonal breasts or implants.

    My experience with dating both transwomen and women is that some of the transwomen I really connected with were really into me in terms of our in depth conversation, easy to get along with, and also adventurous when it came to intimate matters, they made me feel very special.

    When it comes to personality, including how a person thinks, it can vary a lot regardless of whether a person is a transwoman or woman..just because a transwoman was born with male chromosomes doesn't mean she can understand me better than a woman, or that we'd have common interests in male thing - it will always come down to individual connection. For me I just treat a transwoman exactly the same as a woman, and I refer to her as a woman I just use transwoman here for the purpose of differentiation.

    The other part to the question was what is the impact of a male relationship with a transwoman on his friends and family?

    In my first one year relationship with a transwoman, where it was mostly long distance and me visiting her a couple of time, I was open to my friends, some family and some of my work colleagues about the relationship. The fact is I lost some friends in the process of opening up about my relationship, and I also gained some new ones too.

    My best friend, a male, continues to remain my best friend..sure he doesn't understand my choice, but we didn't become friends because of our sexual tastes. In terms of family I believe the preference of your parents is to be in what they see as a male and woman relationship, but they were open to a transwoman in my life if that is what made me happy.

    I think the impact comes down to the prejudices people have or don't have, and that applies to other differences not just because someone is a transwoman e.g. ethnicity, size etc

    There has been a lot of comment about gay, bi etc. Personally I struggled with trying to put myself under a label, and nowdays I really don't need one. I am attracted to femininity which includes both transwomen and women, with a preference to transwomen. If I am gay I would be attracted to men, I'd be looking at "hot" male models and be turned on..which I am not..If I was Bi I'd be attracted to both women and those "hot" male models..which I am not. Does that make me straight? perhaps, but then I don't care for any label, just to be happy and true to myself..if someone says because I like the transwoman genitalia that makes me gay, then I don't care because it is just a label..what matters to me is the love I have for that person, the way I treat that person and how they treat me..with love, care and respect.

  107. First there is an underlying misconception that we need to clear up. It is revealed when you use the phrase 'used to be men'. Transsexual women were never men, even those who actually had to suffer a male puberty. The were ALWAYS WOMEN. Until you get this you don't get it. Now of course transgenderism is a broad church and definitely does include both gay and 'straight' crossdressing men, but no 'straight' man is ever going to be interested in them, not once the clothes come off anyway.

    You also appear to be unfamiliar with Kinsey, and that is why I have put quotes round the word straight above. Please read up on this. Gay and straight are not binaries in that a person is EITHER one or the other; in fact there is s continuum of preference from strict heterosexual (Kinsey 0) to strict homosexual (Kinsey 6). 0s are only interested in feminine, female women and 6s are only interested in manly masculine men. With me so far? Well Kinsey's own results confirm that the MAJORITY OF MEN are neither 0 or 6 but in between. The reduction of a perfectly normal biological range of variation into a duality is the result, mainly, of a vicious, prescriptive, dualistic, monotheistic philosophical legacy which classifies EVERYTHING in either-or terms.

    A similar range exists in gender presentation from the fully cisgendered (natal men who feel completely like men and natel women who feel completely like women.) to the fully transgendered or Benjamin's true transsexual. The largest single group is probably the fully cisgendered but serious research into this is woefully lacking. However we would expect to see a deviation curve similar to Kinsey's.

    Many so-called 'straight' men like quite androgynous natal women, and they are simply displaying that they are not 0 on Kinsey--but they're not 6 either, because they are not attracted to men. Transsexual women may easily fall into their range of subjects of attraction because of the androgynous qualities they have. This is why so many men who identify as 'straight' when what they ACTUALLY mean is 'not Kinsey 6' because they are not attracted to men, find TS women attractive.

    The problem is compounded because, again due to the false dualism that seems ingrained in the Anglo-Saxon mind, bisexualism aas been wrongly reduced to mean equally attracted BOTH to the exact opposite sex/gender (0)and to the exact same (6). Such individuals are actually vanishingly rare.

  108. CRYSTI and Bisexual GUY need to stop being phobics because the second someone says something about them not being "real" people shout TRANSPHOBIC!!!!!!!

    Many of you are pointing out what born women are saying,but skipping over the

    "I date transgender women because they treat me like a King"
    "Understand me more"
    "Don't ague"
    "Are more feminine and look better"
    "Have something extra"

    Then,there is a translady who say

    I love that list Mrtrannylover because when I date straight men,it makes me feel more feminine"

    No hell breaks loose when that goes down,but if a woman goes off,she is somehow fat,stupid,ugly,can't get a man,or TRANSPHOBIC,no she's just pissed that the transgender puts them above another woman.

    Then,some fool wants to post how women were treated extra special,no,not they weren't dummy. Transwomen DO NOT have it harder as there are men in here stepping all over non trans women to defend and put them as better.

    I am a bisexual male,and some of these attitudes are sexist towards none trans women and quite tacky. Some of these men only mention looks,i.e. something extra or they spend more time. SMDH another form of a male putting down women.

  109. I like what Edward has to share, its so refreshing to finally have someone break the ice and tell a story that truly comes from the heart, and NOT from between the legs.
    I myself have allways been a female as stated by MacSchreach.....most people do not understand this....I have never been into watching porn but for the sake of argument I looked into it, I am not sure where the arousal comes from for men, obviously there are men attracted to women, and guys and they want a "full on" experience, then the man wants to be in public with a "passable" transwoman, which I don't understand that term because "passable" should be how you feel, your confidence, we as a society should leave it alone, let us live our lives...isn't there so many other things in life we should be worrying about?

    And Charlie Brown, your not so different than others but I think if you fall in love with someone, fall in love, accept it, and be happy...just....be happy.
    Well everyone, you all have so much to say, I think its wonderful, and please have a wonderful day.
    Darrah

  110. For me its how I treat my man when we are together as well as only someone who has been a man knows how to fully satisfy another male..

  111. Thanks for all the comments, I thought I was all alone out there. I consider myself to be a straight man (whatever that means) However after the death of my wife, I hired a female property manager to look after my condo, several commercial buildings I own in Key West. Part of our agreement is that she lives in my condo until I return in the winter months. This caused her to move in with friends while I was there, silly sense there are 2 extra bedrooms, last year I insisted she stay put. Our business relationship grew into a close friendship. She always looks fantastic, hair, make-up, nails, even in cut-offs & a Tee. Furthermore she loves all sports, likes to go fishing and to my surprise enjoys a good cigar now and again. After watching the sunset over drinks one evening, she confessed her "little secret" to me. I couldn't believe it, but when I told her it didn't matter to me she gave me a hug, than a kiss. I felt strange because I wanted to pull her close and kiss her again. We have grown even closer, and enjoy each other's company, but haven't crossed that sexual barrier yet. She's everything and more,that I look for in a woman,we are discussing how to break the news to my family, she moved out for two weeks while my daughter came to visit, they were the longest 2 weeks. At my age sex isn't the big attraction it once was, I do crave the attention & companionship of a female just not sure how or if to proceed with this one. My biggest fear is of hurting her and wrecking what we have now.

  112. God damn, some of these comments are depressing. I'm a trans woman and a feminist, and my womanhood does not come from Avon or Victoria's Secret. What femininity I possess is an expression of who I am, not a self-taught lure for men. As a matter of fact, since transitioning I've sworn off men entirely. The guys who approach me are just looking for a fuckhole that wont get pregnant and doesn't have to be treated with the same respect they'd reserve for cis women.

    Men who hit on trans women are misogynistic pigs who've realized that cis women are onto them and wont take their shit. You're not old fashioned gentlemen, you're sexist predators preying on one of the most vulnerable classes in western society.

  113. Why Do Straight Men Love Transgendered Women ?

    This thread of posts is very interesting to me for several reasons:

    First… Because I identify myself as a woman.

    (Yes, of transgendered origins But I never wanted to be TGTSTVCDTGTS etc… just a girl ... OK? )

    And second… Because I am a biologist with a published background in human sexuality and attraction based upon evolutionary and ecological considerations such as natural selection, sexual selection, mating rituals, and adaptive advantages of physical and behavioral traits

    (i.e. The Science of. Sex & Gender & Sexual Orientation).

    Further, (and YES to those who take pleasure in reminding me that I was born something else, because I was of course) ... but I Identify myself as and relate to being a Straight Woman who is attracted to straight men who are attracted to women (including me) AND who do not ever wear our clothes.

    Yes, the other posters/contributors/readers here are quite correct in their assumption that some men will approach transgendered women because of their latent homosexuality, bisexuality, or merely a desire to get a hold of and do things with a penis.

    I avoid Gay-Bi peenee weenee chasers like the plague, however, because THAT is insulting both to me and to my long-suffered-for and hard-won femininity. As soon as a fella mentions top-bottom, girl-with-something-extra, do-me, wants to wear my shoes, or claims to be bisexual or curious, I drop him immediately as a total turn-off.

    On a personal/dating level, I take measures to RULE these fellas OUT for dating purposes as well as any other TG or genetic women because, the motives of my sexual partner(s) are very important to me and I wish to be desired for only what I consider to be... "The Right Reasons". That is what turns me on.

    I like men who like women.

    So, That being said… Just Why Do Straight Men Love Transgendered Women ?

    Why do so many straight men want to have sex with or be in love with transgendered women?

    I have thought about this for years and it boils down to this:

    We LOVE being women more than most genetic women… and much more than that…

    We do not ever take our femininity for granted the way so many genetic women do.

    And THAT is what turns men on the most... The "Look at me; I'm sexy!" attitude that their wives have lost. He is afraid of the whole homo-thing of course... but quite needlessly so. I have found that the men who date me are more courageous and masculine and loving of sexy women than anyone who would not or could not love a special lady.

    Sometimes a fella just wants to be with a woman who loves being a woman and who appreciates his desires and his need to just look at and talk to a woman in high heels and nylons and lipstick and who gives her undivided attention just to him. One who does not make him feel stupid or queer when he expresses his deepest longings to her.

    There may be some fetishistic components to the desire of straight men for transgendered women. Fellas do love ladies who wear nylons, high heels, and lipstick. But their overall perception of woman or femininity or what they desire in a woman has been trained by years and years of sexual reinforcement by the ultrafeminine stereotype... a "real" woman.

    Perhaps there may be one or two ultrafeminine women in their lives.... mother, aunt, sister, wife who started out ultrafeminine and girlish but who gave up her femininity after marriage or childbirth.... leaving Him in the lurch with his attraction to feminine glamorous girlie-girl women unrequited for evermore!

    Why shouldn't every man at least once have his fantasy and learned desires fulfilled just once... television, advertizing, movies, and an occasional woman in public, or even his own wife or girlfriend have Teased him for years and years holding the object of his greatest unfullfilled desires just out of his reach. (Seems kind of cruel to me.)

    When a married man comes to me because I love to wear lipstick and nail polish and lacy underwear and nylons and high heels and long hair with ribbons and bows as I flirt and smile and tease... I know he is cheating and I hate to be a part of all that... BUT… I also know that his desire is so very intense that it goes right to the very depths of his soul.

    The greatest compliments that I have ever received have been from men who say that I make them feel more like a man than any other woman ever has. And the most satisfying thing to me is to be able nurture his deep desire and to satisfy his deepest longings in ways that no other woman ever has or will… and to do so willingly... the way a loving mother tenderly feeds and nurtures a hungry child.

    To me, Nurturing IS the very essence of femininity and it defines me as a woman, fulfills my desires, and satisfies the deepest longings in my soul as well.

    Just so we understand each other.... I choose to identify myself as a Straight Woman and I identify with straight women... NOT as TVCDTGTSTVCDTG... I NEVER ever wanted to be one of those... just a girl. So my desire for a man is... only as a woman... I cannot stand gay or bisexual activity or top-bottom talk (yuk... it actually sickens me). That stuff is just not for me.

    I also do not wish to be with GG women or TG women (who are ALL women and sisters to me anyway). I only date straight men who love women... preferably he has never even been with TG women before either. His apprehension is a bit exciting to me and so satisfying when he settles into just enjoying my feminine charms with no concern for my XY origins.

    I am very romantic and actually kind of old fashioned too in many ways. I just Love to Kiss and tease and flirt and make love as a woman... doing only the things that women do (only better of course teeheehee) but only with a man who Loves only women.

    That is what works for me. (BUT, yes of course, I do see how many might consider ALL of this stuff to be gay or queer or bi or something like that anyway. But, my fantasy and my reality is only as an old fashioned romantic feminine girl who loves to be loved by a masculine straight man who loves only sexy women and who sees me as one.

    Old fashioned Chivalry is the defense of masculinity and femininity:

    “You treat me like a lady, and I will make you feel like a man.”

    Old fashioned Chivalry turns me on.

    I have always kind of quizzed the fellas who ask me out... more of a test really... to see if their interest is more in the penis that they think I may or may not have (Teeheehee!) or in the Lady/Woman/Girl that I present and wish to be wanted for.

    If the Penis holds low or moderate interest to them, I will date them. But if Penis is their primary interest or major focus, then I drop them like a hot potato because they are more gay or bisexual than they are interested in my femininity and that turns me right off right away.

    In fact, I find it insulting and disappointing to be wanted for that reason. My femininity must always come first in their desires. The honoring of a woman's (femininity or a man's masculinity) is the very essence of Chivalry. And in my case anyway... is what will, in fact, make the wildest dreams come true for a gentleman who really loves women... and my dreams will come true as well.

    If a man is attracted to me and is rather afraid of my potential penis or avoids it … I take it as a compliment and that increases my desire to be with him and my comfort in doing so.

    Please do not love me or want me BECAUSE I am transgendered. Love me in spite of it.

    (Similarly do not ever tell a fat girl that you love her or want her because she is fat... even if it is true... she does not want to hear it or to be loved or wanted for that reason either. See?)

    I am not saying that the way I feel is similar for all other transgendered women and gentleman admirers... as in ALL things, there is a range of diversity across the various spectra that define who we are.

    Again… To me… Nurturing others IS the very essence of femininity and it defines me as a woman, fulfills my desires, and satisfies the deepest longings in my soul as well.

    THAT is my story and I am sticking to it! Teeheehee! Hugs darling! Love, Your Suzi

    [Please find me on Facebook: “Candace Suzanne”:

    https://www.facebook.com/candace.suzanne.miss.suzi ]

  114. Oh my God, Candace! That was so eloquently put; it felt as if I had looked at my own soul's reflection in the mirror of humanity. Although I prefer to love other women by virtue of the individual that I was (spiritually, still am) and the environs of my upbringing, I understand your dismay at what I term "The Tranny Chaser" syndrome.
    Unbelievably, I encounter that same demeaning attitude frequently from our lesbian sisters. I could understand to a point, male logic regarding us "Trans-Women", my disgust with what I consider a misnomer notwithstanding. It is disheartening enough to be ostracized by our natal sisters, but, to encounter the same dismissive attitudes and derogatory remarks, when one would expect a sensitive, compassionate connection within our own, is doubly painful.
    My intention with this comment was not to blindly categorize all our girls, but instead suggest that the discussion applies to women as well. Our sisters should look this subject over to see if it raises their awareness or consideration in their relationships with "us" - not that I relish being labeled as such. Anyhow, I thank you Candace, for some of those touching insights. Bless you!.....TONI

  115. I have been a completely passable full time transwoman for more than five years. Done hormones, breast augmentation, no hair on my body, except my head. I am told I am very attractive and guys get turned on by me all the time. However, I have no interest in sexual play dates and have been really frustrated. I can't seem to find a compatible guy who is interested in a long term relationship. I know guys in general are resistant to commitment but it is really hard. I will say that many guys are attracted to me and trans girls in general because they are curious and just want to get off. But I assume there are guys out there that want something more meaningful.
    Danielle Roberts
    http://www.facebook.com/danielle.roberts.961

  116. First of all transgender is just an umbrella term, which includes, Transsexual, gender queer, drag queens and kings, and bi gender. Transgender basically means you want to change genders and transsexuals change their sex, thats why it's tranSEXual. And it is a scientific fact that most transsexuals have a brain exactly the same as a genetic female, and for all the "tranny chasers", they are looking for a "shemale". Shemales are the stereotypical sexy, fun, and attractive transsexuals who keep the penis. And most transsexuals do not spend all day caring about their looks because we are women, we act like women, we think like women, and we behave like women, because we are born with a female brain. And it's different for every transsexual because not everyone desires to transition at the same age, some may start at 15 or even 60, so it's different for everyone. And for the people who say every man and women were born to reproduce, not everyone can, some people are sterile, so if a man is sterile is he not considered a man? Same goes for women.

  117. Hello! I just want to state some of my opinions and feelings. Well im a straight man who loves only straight women and transgender women both. Ive dated many women but have recently been dating a transgender woman for a few months. Now first i wanna say I believe everyone has different opinions and feelings transgenders and straight men both.

    Some feel this and that way about everything and everyissue so there much to be discussed and agree and disagree on. Because were all different! But as for me I dont exactly know why I am so attracted to transgenders. I mean as far as penis and vagina go I dont have a problem with either as long as its a women Im dealing with.

    But as for why I like them so much? Ive never known a good answer other then I just do and that is just the way I am. But I have to say some of the things ive noticed after really falling in love with my current ts gf is that I do feel a good connection and she DEFINATELY understands me much quicker and easier then any GG Ive ever dated.

    But also I feel in everyway like im talking to and getting to know a female and not a man. So I really like that. Theres another thing I want to talk about that prolly wasnt mention at all but I absolutely love about transgenders. How can I put this... They know what they want, they are consistent and they are not overly emotional and indesisive.

    With all my past girlfriends I always had to worry about how she was gonna be today. Was she gonna love me today? Was she gonna have an emotional quirk thing and wanna break up with me for some reason Ill never understand and she will never fully understand and be able to exsplain to me? That has always been the source of my broken heart for along long time.

    And with my current ts gf one thing I can feel and sense through and through is Consitency. I know what im going to be dealing with everyday. Somebody who loves me and isnt going to change that over any indesisive and emotionally confuseing un understandable reason. Now im not saying all women do that But 100% of the time in all of the MANY relateionships ive been in with females they do it to me without fail on a regular basis every single time.

    I have nothing against women as a whole for this and still love them and apreciate them. But its nice to have a real girl friend who is really really a girl in every interaction we ever have who doesnt have that terrible emotionally indesisive trait. Hahaaha sorry. Thats my two cents i wanted to add that thought to the discussion.

  118. There must be a good amount of money involved in all the services a person needs in order to make this transition. It is very disturbing that people are actually taking advantage of an illness. It is an illness. If I wake up tomorrow with the urge to be a bunny, no one in their right mind would advice me to actually become one.

    You guys are sick and if this is all the knowledge and wisdom this century has to offer you in terms of a treatment for your sickess, then I am really sorry. Sometimes, people delude themselves to escape reality. If every person on this plane would suffer from this sickness and we would all start to rip our testicles and ovaries out...yup!

    You got the picture. An abomination indeed. Now jump and call me whatever your sick minds have to say to keep up the illusion that you are normal and thats normality. Better try and understand you are sick and people take advantage of your sickness. Men..eh! But doctors...thats horible!

  119. I have recently discovered my boyfriend's secret fixation on TGs. He gets very defensive if I ask any questions regarding TGs, but how can I not ask when I do not understand. He says he has done this since he was a teen, but I am having a hard time coming to terms with it since it is a closed subject. Does anybody have any suggestions on how we can better understand each other? I feel like everything I say is wrong and makes him upset and defensive.

  120. I think men find transgender women attractive because they try their hardest to look as feminine as they can and they have like millions of operations to look feminine too sometimes their tall and if you ever see a transgender she's most likely gonna look girlie

  121. I am a woman I'm proud to be one. I also like girls and boys. My man also likes both sexes he also has had relations with a transsexual woman. Who really care. Bi,gay whats ever I'm sure men don't have relationship with TS girls inspite of natural born woman thats silly. I don't call myself bi neither does my man we also don't say we Are straight or gay. We just are and we like what we like. I don't believe in labels. If a guys is with a TS he obviously likes her so why does it matter. just because TS girl weren't born with the right pArts doesn't mean they don't have feelings. Everybody is looking for somebody n to be happy. We Are l people n in the end we all die the same. An TS girls who wear makeup doesn't mean they hiding something. That's who they Are they see themselves As woman thats why they dress up like on. For me to be a proud woman why can't they be proud of how they see themselves u dont think they lived a hard like not feeling comfortable in their own skin. And seeing themselves as something their not that would hurt. I'm so proud to be a woman to think of my self being born with a penis I'd be really u comfortAble like reAlly. I just say to all TS girls it all power to ya pain is beauty and do what make u be the best woman u feel to be. We all deserve happiness

  122. Hi every one,

    I'm a GG and though I agree with a lot of what's been said, I must say a few things still bother me.
    I find it very sexist that TGs would be considered "better women" than GGs because they are supposedly always all dolled-up and somehow try harder to cater to men's desires.
    That, to me, simply reinforces sexist stereotypes. Being a woman shouldn't be reduced to pleasing men. I'm glad that TGs can be accepted as full-women and loved by both straight and bi men but I resent the implication that there are "better" and "lesser" women out there. That's just offensive. Pretending that being a GG makes you less attractive or less understanding to men just seems ridiculous to me ! Personality has very little to do with genetics.
    I hope I won't offend anyone by saying this but I think that a lot of TGs really wish that they were GGs, that they had experienced all that being a woman entails since birth, that they could look feminine with almost no effort (though some apparently do) and most of all that they could have children.
    I really sympathize with the challenges that being a transgender must bring and I don't consider TGs to be lesser women but I think it's dishonest to claim that being a transgender is EXACTLY the same, if not better, than being a female-born woman. That's just not true. It is in no way "less than" but it is undoubtedly different and relationships with TGs come with their own challenges. That being said, I applaud both the men and women who deal with those challenges daily and who are themselves, no matter what the rest of the world has to say !

  123. To Meg:

    You're boyfriend is straight. I am attracted to trans women. I find feminine trans women who look and sound like women, and have a penis arousing for reasons that I can't clearly understand. I'm absolutely not attracted to men, nor have I ever been attracted to penises. It's just the image of a woman with a penis that gives me this impression that she can connect sexually with me. I think it has to do with the way we were raised as boys. I was raised in an Islamic country in the Middle East, so I kinda have a very vague understanding of women and female psychology.
    Some of us, like me, were raised to believe that women hate sex and that having sex with a woman is equal to raping her. So a woman with a penis and obvious attraction to men make us feel that strong physical attraction towards trans women.

    I'm dating a ts-woman for the first time in my life, and honestly, I started watching ts-porn when I was single a couple of years and that's how I got into it. I gotta say: I never consider her anything but a woman.

  124. Normal men seek love, acceptance, and pleasing sex. If a lovely transgender can bring these things to a relationship with me, I can love her the same as any woman. I dont desire any masculine males. Why? They lack the feminine beauty I so appreciate. Life must be beautiful for me to be happy. Will some wonderful tg lady please rescue me? I'm out here, lonely, and I need you! for

  125. Hi, I am a MtF transgendered person, even though I identify more as a female than a male, I am non-op, I do not want to lose my penis, I want breast implants and body hair removal, etc, so I can look more like a woman in physical appearance. I usually wear knee length dresses or skirts that are modest because I like the classy lady look. I am very comfortable in public dressed as a woman, I am much happier when I am dressed as a woman. I want to live full time as a woman soon and am working toward that goal.
    From my experiences of living as a woman part time, I believe that most men who are looking for a tg woman, is to take a walk on the wild side to fulfill their fantasies. I personally do not like it when men approach me asking to have sex, especially when they are crude and disrespectful. I usaully am very rude to those neanderthals. When a man is respectful and compliments me on my appearance and treats me as a lady, I am very appreciative and show respect back to him. I dont date men, and have no desire to be with a man. When I do get asked out by men I tell them no I rather not.
    I am attracted to GG's only, so that makes life a bit lonely at time for me, because most women dont want to be in a relationship with a transgendered male to female, however alot of women do want to have a one night fling with me to take their walk on the wild side so to speak, which is a big let down for me. I have had a few women who have wanted a relationship with me, but when their family get involved and discourages them from continuing their relationship with me can be a heartbreak for both of us. there has been alot of tears shed on both of our parts because of it. Being transgendered has its ups and downs, but the positives for me far outweights the negatives. I hope one day to find a woman who is not afraid to be in a long term relationship with me as a woman. At times I feel it would be easier if I was attracted to men, but I am not. I do get asked out by men several time a year, however I am not into men. and yes I do feel bad when they are very polite and respectful to me, and I turn them down.

  126. I think its mostly that men think they can have casual sex with transgender women. This is my opinion as a transwoman with experience dating men, the men that seek us out are men who DO objectify ALL women and see us primarily as sex objects, and in the case of transwomen, even more abuse-able and disposable. The men that we meet in day to day life, come to know and love us for who we are, and dont care about labels but about the person in front of them...those are the real men and those are the only men ANY of us ladies should be settling for.

    I do wear make-up every day, but for me, because i like the way i look in it.
    I do love to cook-its my frickin occupation!
    I like a lot of kind of stereotypical 50's woman things-but i have a die hard addiction to comic books and horror novels along with a host of other 'tomboy' characteristics (I KNOW KUNG FU!)...but the genetic girls who say im living a lie or that i am inferior to you in some way...all i can say is in some ways you are right...I can never have a child the way you can, though i do have a beautiful daughter who i could never trade for anything, even if that thing were what i wished every single second of my life to be true...This does not however, mean that i could not offer a happy and fulfilling life to someone that i loved.
    And trans women are jealous... how could we not be? That doesnt mean that we are covetous thieves, more like awkward little sisters, we want to be like you but sometimes misstep. We are not as experienced as you are in the feminine world, not because we dont belong there or are intruders, but because we were born lost and confused, and are only now drifting into the sheltered harbors of home. Yes there are ugly trans women, some look like they got hit by a truck and stumbled into a dress, but then again there are genetic women who look just as bad...there are a lot more of you out there so there is bound to be...but the point we are all missing here is that physiology should under no circumstances dictate whether someone is treated with respect, dignity, and understanding of their uniquely human condition.

    I have always been a woman and the only reason i know a little more about guys than SOME WOMEN is because they would tell me stuff that they would never tell a girl for years until they found out i wasnt really in the guy club. Honestly though, these things could easily be surmised through careful observation...which is where i finally come to my point...
    To the genetic women who hate/fear/dislike/disapprove of transwomen, the men who chase us and treat us like sex objects or think we're 'better' because we are more docile or easily controlled, and my fellow trans women who sadly allow themselves to be exploited by these men or find yourselves under the delusion that you are indeed better than ANY other group, including genetic women...you are all fools and the intellectual inferiors to all of the thinking, reasoning, logical, and empathic human beings on this planet. Please seek to better yourselves, though seeking knowledge will not be enough. You will have to totally obliterate your sense of self as it obviously has its origins in a very negative setting. Try to define yourself through your positive actions, admit to your failures and shortcomings and constantly work to better yourself and the world around you, and as soon as you open your mouth to say something bad about a group of people that you obviously do not understand because your primitive brain is not as highly evolved and capable of abstract reasoning as person's aught to be...just stop, because you are now officially an ant pondering the nature of a thermonuclear reactor...totally SOL and too stupid to realize it...sorry the human race left you behind 50 years ago, you just keep ruining everyone's good time.
    My story is not the same as a genetic woman's, but my femininity and womanhood is something inherent in me that i constantly fall short of adequately explaining. Suffice it to say that I know who i am and how best to make myself physically comfortable within my own body. I would never claim to have that intimate knowledge of someone else and why people believe it is acceptable to make these claims can only be attributed to stupidity, ignorance and hate.

  127. As I look at all of these comments in this article, I am wondering what the he'll is going on with this war we are having. I am a biological woman, and it's pretty sad that you have Bio women feeling inferior or against ts women and you have ts women against Bio women. Then you have these sorry excuse for men turning us against each other like a cat fight, saying how one is better than the other! Whether you're trans or biologically a woman, we should understand each other and be sisters! Transgendered women may be born a man, but they are women now, just like us biological women. We should be embracing each other, and I refuse to believe one is Better than the other or that men prefer one and not the other. Men like who they like and if they like transgender women, so be it. If they like biological women, so be it. But their choices shouldn't overshadow our lives! Because while the men are sitting back in this article and looking at us fight, we're here tearing each other down! I don't know about you guys, but I embrace my transgendered sisters. They're here, so get over it, and respect it!

  128. I have a problem with my bf he loves looking @ tg women on internet. He has fanatics bout bing with one. So we went to a sex shop got a strap on for me & he enjoyed it he said but I feel like he would rather have the real deal. He said he don't think he could ever b with a real tg. I think he is scared to admit it that that's what he really wants. I've been with him 4yrs & it hurts to know I'm just not doing it for him. Should I leave & hope he finely gets what he wants.

  129. I have a problem with my bf he loves looking @ tg women on internet. He has fanatics bout bing with one. So we went to a sex shop got a strap on for me & he enjoyed it he said but I feel like he would rather have the real deal. He said he don't think he could ever b with a real tg. I think he is scared to admit it that that's what he really wants. I've been with him 4yrs & it hurts to know I'm just not doing it for him. Should I leave & hope he finely gets what he wants.
    Plz help crying inside.

  130. P.S he also likes to dress like a woman hair, make-up, shave all his hair off the work's. He makes a very beautiful woman & I like it. I just wish he was honest bout what he is & what he really wants.

  131. I used to date GGs when I was younger. One night I got with a TG and it was FANTASTIC- best evening of my life! I held out for awhile, but I soon found that I was masturbating only to "shemale" porn and thinking of TGs (and the TG I'd been with) when I was having sex with my girlfriend. At that point, the writing was on the wall and I realized that I had pretty much lost all interest in "pussy." Don't get me wrong- I can still appreciate the beauty of a good looking GG, but I'd much rather "my gal" have a big dong between her legs than a pussy, particularly since it turns out that I'm a submissive bottom. Frankly, I think a whole lot MORE so-called straight men would end up converted if they knew how much better the sex is.

  132. I think a lot of the attraction is porn generated. The porn industry has been pushing the tranny image because it sells and has generated a lot of fantasy in regard to trans women.

  133. so much close mindedness. Not all ts women are the same. I like romance, I can get jealous too but thats just like any other human, I dont try to be feminine, i dress like a tomb boy for the most part and still look good. it seems like some of the men posting here are looking for a sex robot, i guess like attracts like sometimes because you men sound uncaring and cold like a machine. You can say your "ts girlfriends" are like that but dont group us all together.

  134. What attracts me to transgenders is the courage and willpower it has taken for them to get where the are. I am a straight man who has been married for many years and I have four children. When I became interested in transgendered women, it was sexual in nature. But when the novelty wore off, I came to understand that -- and this is so obvious it seems stupid to say -- that each transgender person is unique, but each shares the experience of realizing they are in the wrong body and they act on that realization.

    That's what's so impressive. They act on that realization. I can't imagine having half that amount of courage.

    I have done some soul-searching and asked myself if I am bi-sexual or gay, and there are two answers: 1.) I really don't find men attractive in any way, and 2.) who cares? Why label my sexuality?

    To all the transgender men and women who might come across this post -- God Bless You!! Be passable or not, be successful or not, just remember to be proud. You have accomplished more by acting on your transgender issues than almost everyone else on the planet.

  135. Wow. Lots of comments. I know its boggling to some people to realize that "gender" is just a social construct. Actually gender is as varied as people are. They forget how indoctrinated they are and how maybe there is more to the story. Us ts women are very interesting people. We are all different. Many of us are not over the top. We are just as varied as women in general. We have just as varied sexualities, interests, lives, etc. True we cannot have babies, but really look around at all the babies that are being born. It is sad that our human existence is based on the selfish act of bringing children into the world. Plus to be more controversial, we dont need relationships, or at least in the conventional sense. We cant live without others, but it must be known that the ability to satisfy ourselves comes from within. Reaching out is often in response to a breakdown of that, especially if it is for validation.

    The things we do are for us. Its all about ourselves personally. If you dont master yourselves you can always rush to have the baby who will complete you while giving you the chance to learn yourself by looking into this genetic mirror.

    There is more to life than having babies. Maybe try self realization. Analyzing why it is people behave in certain ways, it is obvious that most never get close. A well sorted and adjusted trans woman and the people who find her attractive are closer than most. I feel, as trying as it is at time, a huge blessing to be able to live my life first as a man and now as a woman. I like who I am.

  136. I think with all things equal, a man would still choose a non transgender over a tg. If you have tg A, and gg A, yay for learning new terms!, if the man feels he's getting the same emotional connection and understanding out of the gg, the same amount of 'trendiness" as the article above stated, then he'll chose the gg. This may anger some people, but I used to be a vegan, and I know the difference between fake meat, and real meat, but I also know the difference between crap vs. good vegan food. I do prefer some vegan meat over real meat, but that's usually because they offer me things real meat doesn't, like a lot less grease. lol

  137. Reading all the comments here, I wanted to see what people thought of the idea of being attracted to a transgendered person. I also wondered what people would think of my own slight affinity for transgendered women. It's true that I've sometimes sought out material to satisfy some of the intriguing fantasies of mine, which mainly come from videos I've seen and articles I've read. That being said, I'm also going to stop. Being on here and reading all the comments, wide and varied, has been an eye opening experience! O_O It's true that I am attracted to transwomen because of the "exotic" nature of it, as shameful as that sounds when I admit it out loud. I get tired when people say you must be gay, if you are attracted to the penis and testicles. I am NOT attracted to most men, and the traits they possess. Whether it be fat hairy bears, or the young well muscled buff dudes who seem to be everywhere, I am just not attracted to most male physical traits. Sorry, I'm just not. :/ If the penis is pretty much the only part on the guy you are attracted to, you're not really gay. In that case, it becomes more of a fetish. I would like to experiment with a penis, but with a beautiful exterior on the person it is attached to also. However, I would treat the person right, if I ever had an encounter with someone romantically. I want to pleasure a person in that way, and have them feel good from that stimulation, not just use it for my benefit and then throw them away without a care as to their needs. I also like the idea of a third gender, because it's something that is very appealing in this society. :) I like the idea of being with someone of a third gender, because so much of what society ascribes to gender and sex is socially constructed BS and garbage, it's refreshing to see someone who is separate from that, and can't really be classified easily. :) However, from what I've read, many transgendered people hate that aspect of themselves, and they don't really consider themselves transgendered; they consider themselves "men" or "women", period, and hate the part of themselves that goes in defiance of that. Knowing that the person you're with hates their body is the most repelling thing you can have in terms of arousal, and it's a definite turn off. So I wouldn't be able to enjoy myself, knowing that all the while the transwoman was having a torturous experience. :( Most transgendered people also don't consider themselves a third gender, so there goes that fantasy, too. :/ There is a reason why fantasies and reality are often separate: because often times, they're not really compatible. Reading all these comments shows the definite perils of trying to make a "T-girl" fantasy a reality, because there are too many emotions at stake! O_O It's a painful experience for those involved, if you're not careful, and especially when the relationship starts based off a fantasy. However, let it be known that I would never approach a transwoman. If I can't give anything more than sex to someone, either because of my state of mind, or because I'm just not attracted to them enough, I would never waste their time. :) It's not fair to them, and I don't willingly hurt people in that way. I don't approach cis-gendered women, either. Due to some bad past experiences, I'm pretty suspicious of relationships in general. So if I'm suspicious of "regular" relationships, I'm sure as hell not going to take on a Transwoman, turning around and treating her in that way! (The same way my ex treated me.) I don't toy with people's emotions like that. That's just a cruelty I'm not willing to inflict. So while I may fantasize about them, I would never be with a transwoman unless I could serious devote myself 100%, mind and soul to her, if she wanted more. :) Reading all the comments here, it makes me feel a bit guilty about being a "Tranny Chaser", even if I never actually pursued transwomen before. :) So yeah, all the fantasizing and longing for an experience with a transwoman, that's all done with. Before anyone brings it up, I know I'm not doing anyone any furthers, because it's not about doing favors for people and I don't feel thrilled or elated at doing this! It's about treating people right and not using them for your own selfish ends. :D Because ultimately transwomen have some enormous issues they are dealing with including, judging by some of the female posters here, some incredible bigotry - they don't need my immature attraction mucking up things for them further! ;D *Smiles a bit painfully, because of the serious subject matter*

    I don't know what the point of this is. I hope I made sense. :) Sorry for the abundant emoticons. It's part of my OCD, that I have to make sure I'm being understood completely at all times when talking to strangers, and the emoticons help with that online. :) It's just a quirk of my personality, so indulge me. Sorry for the long paragraph without a break too. I wanted to cut it in parts, but it just all flowed together so well, and it was all dealing with the same subject, so I decided to keep it in one group! I'm just offering some perspectives from a person who admires transwomen, but realizes his obsession with it may not be healthy. And this is all from someone with a superficial attraction to transwomen! O_O God forbid you're someone in an actual relationship, and you're emotionally connected with the person, not just in lust with them. :) And you're trying to manage all that emotional baggage, in addition to all the crap society throws at you. We all have great baggage, even in regular relationships, so in unorthodox relationships it must be doubly so! I truly respect those men who are able to have fulfilling relationships with Transwomen, and those transwomen who are able to allow them to have relationships with them. :) These are just rantings about various thoughts this topic has inspired in me, and everyone needs to vent occasionally. I will say this one thing, though. Whether it is someone who identifies as a Woman, or a person I consider more of a Third Gender, I have never thought of a transwoman as a "MAN". It is always either a woman, or what some would refer to as "Genderqueer". :) The mindset is everything, and someone who considers herself a woman deep down inside has no reason to be doubted by others, simply because she was born "a man", as some base commenters would put it, in terms of her external physical appearance. You know your own soul best, after all.

  138. @ Meg. You are not alone n your discovery about your boyfriend's interest in transsexuals. Frankly, a week does not go by but I hear some similar story, and that is the tip of the iceberg, believe me. So first, let me reassure you your boyfriend is not gay or bi. He is turned on by the feminine attractiveness of transsexual models coupled with the fact that they (most girls in porn are pre-op) have a sexual organ that he can relate to.

    If you want to research into human culture you will discover that men have been afraid of vaginas since the dawn of time. I won't go into detail here, but Camille Paglia's excellent 'Sexual Personae' is a great starting point. For many (probably most), the combination of feminine sexuality with a non-threatening sexual organ, is a huge stimulation.

    But there are some things to remember. The first is that most men who like transsexual porn are attracted to the femininity, not to the masculine member. It's the combination that does the trick. The second is that men fantasise sexually in a very different way to women. Men by nature objectify: we are evolved to do this as the hunter/protector in human society. We immediately translate visual input into categories. (Lots of femininists don't like this, but tough, it's the way we are.)

    If you found your boyfriend looking at ordinary-girl porn, would yoube so upset? You might be miffed, since you should be enough for hum, which I agree with, but it would not question the fundamental nature of your relationship with him. Neither does this.

    The simple fact is that men will fantasaise sexually about anything. It is quite normal for straight men to be turned on by transsex porn, and the ones who deny this attraction are either undersexed or lying, or gay.

    If he begins to meet transwomen in real life that is different. In the first place it is a betrayal and you should challenge it. However, in my experience, and I have been studying this for over a decade, only a tiny minority of men who enjoy transsex porn actually ever do anything in real. When they do, there is almost always a stimulus--divorce is the biggest one, but there are others. This is especially the case if the divorce has been bitter and followed by failed attempts to start relationships with other genetic women.

    If that happens and the man begins having sex with transwomen, then there seems a very strong tendency to stick with it. The saying is 'once you've been with a transwoman, you never go back'. I doubt if you are anywhere near that.

  139. I don't care what anyone else says you dead on. I dated a transexual for 3 years almost married her had never really met any. She was the second one I ever met and I fell hard. 1 thing I have to say to any guys considering this straight gay or bi be careful. A lot of them are not all great people they will do anything to get ahead usually like I said again not all but a lot if she does anything in the adult world don't get too attached because she will leave and ur heart will be truly broken. I loved my x she was a true blessing. I screwed it up I cheated and she could never forgive me for it so we are over and now I'm alone sad thing is I wanted to marry her. Treat umm right because they will hurt u worse too then any biological woman ever can unless he takes ur kids too.
    Dr. Boner

  140. I'm typically to running a blog and i actually appreciate your content. The article has really peaks my interest. I am going to bookmark your site and hold checking for brand new information.

  141. I am a 29 year old women, who strongly believes that trans women are as beautiful and real as any other women. I feel very saddened that there is still so much stigma attached to this. It shouldn't be an issue.If someone is born male, although feels 100 per cent female, then I believe they should act upon what makes them happy, and be on the outside how they feel in the inside. I do not believe that men prefer trans women just for looks or because they are bi/gay. I think men just prefer women with whom they connect and feel comfortable with, trans or not. I have so much respect for trans women and i would like to apologise for all the "biological" women who have made such degrading remarks about trans women, not all of us think the same way.

  142. I am a married man that is bi-sexual. I truly enjoy the beauty and feminity of a woman but also enjoy the penis of a man. It may sound pretty simple but that is pretty much how I feel. Others may have different reasons and I get that. Adding that I think a TG knows how to please a man as well as a wowman if not in soem cases better.

  143. Hello! I was drawn to this discussion and am glad to see it engaged and pushing understanding more into the light.

    However, there are a number of misconceptions that a few are operating from or making assumptions regarding. One, would be that there is an overall judgement being made regarding statements of some men here and being taken to mean "transwomen are better than GG" as a an indictment of cisgender women everywhere. Has it ever occurred to you few kvetching about/insulted by it that it might be being used as a subjective assessment of the girls they've interacted with and not a blanket condemnation of the entire XX-chromosome having population? Does it have to be a misogynistic, gay/bi-in hiding or delusional excuse or couldn't this simply be men talking from their own referential experience regarding those women they've interacted with? Why do some feminists (and understand clearly, I choose my words carefully...some being a few) have this overwhelming need to slight someone on their POV or regarding their possible attempt to relate their experience without having to write an article of their own?

    I can tell you without any hesitation that the man I'm with has NEVER had a gay/bi moment in his life. I'm the first "alternative" relationship he's ever had, the only dalliance with someone like me that he's ever had. He's attracted to who I am, drawn to how I revel in my femininity, how that serves to energize his own masculinity and my desire to be and give all that I am to the man I love. He's not confused. He's not hiding from himself. I'm not a fetish to him. I'm not an easy-out for his ego. He's as alpha male as I've ever known a man to be (and still be sane and not hyper-aggressive). He's intensely passionate, well spoken and educated. He challenges my intellect and he's very certain of what he wants and that's me. All of me. He doesn't desire my "bits" but he's not going to play the "out of sight out of mind" game regarding them because (and we've talked about this recently) to him it would feel like he was rejecting part of me. Obviously he doesn't want me using "it" on him while it's still present, but neither do I. All in all, I consider myself to be improbably fortunate that I found him and that I have him in my life.

    Another would be that any of us are "sick". Anyone so willing to try to proscribe our validity so insultingly and from such a falsely self-induced sense of authority should be ready to be ignored by society at large on the point in question. Even if they don't agree with me, generally most people are smart enough to see that for the kind of manure it is. Also, if you're going to continue debating on topics that you're not invested in personally then at least take a damn debate course somewhere. Then at least you could come to the table and not vomit logical fallacies all over everyone else in your lazy attempts to make a cogent point.

    For those taking the "TG women do NOT have it worse than GG", I have this to say. Is it illegal anywhere for you to be GG? Is it illegal anywhere for you to dress and express yourself to the public at large? How likely is it that you could drive through the Ozarks and other exceedingly conservative areas of the US and feel like your life was in danger every minute until you arrived at a safe place? How often do you have to either correct or remind medical personnel, cops, judges, retail clerks, mechanics, postal workers, UPS delivery agents, the SSA, your employer, strangers on the street, members of your own family and god knows who else what your name is? How about what pronoun they should be using? Have you ever feared simply going into a store for fear the proprietors or other customers would react aggressively? Ever looked at every day you got up for work or school and dreaded the next 8 hours because it's either going to feel like you're being continuously dangled over a pit full of starved lions all waiting for an opportunity to take a bite or like you've buried half of yourself alive just to avoid every single negative outcome of you living just like everyone else, free to express themselves? How insidious has any dismissal of you been? By insidious I mean malicious, not merely callous.

    I'm sorry to tell you very myopic few that this was my life prior to age 21. Some vacillated between extremes and others appeared and remained either terrifying or frustrating to the point that my knowing where Dad hid his trigger-lock keys at was a very bad thing. Half of that has continued till the present day. Transgender women haven't had it worse or better as a collective group. Our experience is different, even between each other. Different doesn't have to equate to "worse" or "better". But at the same time, it likewise doesn't leave firm ground on which to stand and declare that cisgender women "have had it worse". You've had different battles, bad ones, and many of them continue. Stop trying to use this as a devaluation mechanic. There's nothing righteous or deserved or proper about a person being victimized for what they are and looking at women's suffrage, or the history of slavery, or so very much of the world's historical evils would make me think that more women and men should empathize with that notion.

    How would you feel if you had to have a hysterectomy or bilateral mastectomy and because of such, you suddenly didn't qualify as female to any given person? That the reasons for having the surgeries wouldn't matter, but because you can't be impregnated or breast feed you are unwillingly assigned a classification and thus expectations that run in direct opposition to the very way you think. The very nature of the person you are. Now stop...and consider this. Did you at any point of reading the above think or even feel the equivalent of "But I'm a woman, obviously, so that's moot"? See, it's evident that gender is assigned not only by doctors and the state, but by individuals and ourselves. We do it every day, and EVERYONE does it to everyone else. It's one of the things about us as individuals that is classified more often and with as little cursory examination and more casual assurance than anything else about ourselves. It's done with a simple glance and without any other input, no actual knowledge of the person, or even any real consideration beyond that first visual clue.

    Also, just to touch on the subject of critical thinking...you can't claim something subjective isn't true or right. You can't logically denounce the veracity of a subjective claim and when you've no objective proof (or even a mutually agreed upon modern delineations of criteria) to call that claim's objective truth into question, all you're left doing is vomiting your own subjective criteria all over people in a way that you'd never want done to you. You don't have to accept subjective truths, but you don't get to rubber-stamp them as obviously false in an attempt to appeal to common sense, and not actual truth. You can't say that gender, something that is INTENSELY subjective and relative, is determined solely by X or Y chromosomes, or by genitals, or by any "common sense" marker. Rationally, that sort of thinking no longer holds water either.

  144. Well this is an insightful group discussion.
    To give perspective to what I will be writing below I am a guy that was
    formerly quite homophobic until I started to do theatre and film acting
    rather late in life with my children and met worked with and befriended a
    lot of gay and bi men and women, and much like when societal dictatates
    of extreme nationalism and racism diappear when people actually meet
    people from different countries and ethnic backgrounds , I think my sociea
    perceptions of gay and bi people disapeared. When I switched my career into
    photography and fashion design of course majority of peopple I work with fall
    into these categories- and I will note that these categories are how these indiviuals
    categorize themselves, I dont impose the labels. my current and most recent
    girlfriends are bi - they have sex with men and women, and with my current
    gf we have sex with other girls together.
    My first interaction with a T Girl was a tall striking model in my boutique , she was
    a roommate of a photographer sharing my studio.
    I was a kittle intimidated at first shes 6'5 and very assertive, but I approached her
    and we chatted and we did a deal where she wears my dresses at her drag shows
    and I get the publicity. We did this for a while, she doesnt do drag anymore but we still
    see each other socially. Next friend I met that is transisioning interned in my LA store
    and I was just fascinated by his/ ger story of wanting to trnsition- that was 3 years ago
    he/she is now on hormones but continues to dress androgynously so cant really tell just looks
    amazingly high fashion. My 3rd T girl i got to know also interned for me but wa a bit of a
    money grabber so we discontinued working together but this was just a bisiness decision on my part. i dont date models or people work for me so dating them didnt occur to me.
    Recently I met a TS escort on a website and we had great sex and we ended up spending whole day and nite together, we stay in touch by texting as she lives in Vegas. Recently I met her roommate and we had sex anf hung , and had lunch next day.
    In my opinion they were/ are all great people who decided they are girls and intend to live that way and I love them all. I dont distinguish them from any other girl or think less of any ts girl any more than I would now distinguish between homosexual people and the so called mainstream. My
    experience is when you meet people you either like them or not based on how you interact,n
    ot on preconceived ideas of whether you "should" like them or not. Thats in the government or country rulers interest to stick to nationalistic racist family values rhetoric and I reject all that for the bs it is.
    I am very happy with my bi girlfriend, but I will continue to meet up with and have sex with ts and any other girl that excites me.
    I am sure to the mid west shock jock followers im a perverted gay , but Im just me. I think as time goes on the distinction between ts and other girls will dissolve, just give it time and if your a t girl I think as people have more exposure to people that are different to mainstream issue like intolerance and discrimination will go away. Thats in western society, I cant speak for middle east or asia.

  145. The article is not that interesting, as it just doesn't seem very honest. The discussion,on the other hand,is very interesting. A wide range of opinions.

    The issue I'm seeing here is people trying to claim some sort of gender superiority by using some pretty disturbing generalizations. TS women are no better than biological women and vise versa. Your opinion is totally subjective and based off your own experiences and biases. And this idea that TS women are somehow better able to relate to men because they we're born as males and have some sort of residual male mind is absurd, it's science fiction. It really sounds like a shallow attempt to justify physical attraction to a TS woman.

    Why make a big deal about the hetero/bi/gay thing anyway? That's too simplistic. I myself enjoy transsexual porn, I would have sex with a ts if I found her to be attractive, and yes, I would totally play with her penis... With my tongue. It's all just flesh. I am married to a biological female and I don't find men to be physically attractive. Does that mean I'm 100% hetero? Probably not, but who really cares, it's just a word.

  146. I feel that some people get sexual orientation mixed up with gender identity. When in reality there are two seperate things to it. This goes to Genetic Women, a man that is attracted to a transsexual woman doesnt make him gay or bi. Lets say he see's a transsexual woman and she's gorgeous and passable and he has an immediate attraction towards her and the only part (penis) thats left in her that he can or can't probably cope with. Why does that have to make him gay???, he apparently sees her as a woman that he sees. Honestly now a days people have the right to identify themselves in whatever way they feel like whether its gay, straight, or bi. It is not for you to determine so. Lets say when you see someone in the store and you go like wow that person is hot. You are attracted to that person based on their appearance not for whats inside their pants that's how being attracted to someone really is in a physical way. Actually people are attracted to one another based on their appearance, you dont determine how hot, cute and gorgeous someone is based on their genitals. So far when it comes to men being attracted to a Ts woman is because they see them for the woman they are, based on the way they express themselves outwardly. So get out of your box and learn more, honey boo! And stop being so ignorant.

  147. sweetys I am a transsexual and the things I have discovered and learnt over time,woaaaa.yes straight men do like trannys,why because all men all I don't care,all like dick,but they don't necessesarily like men.the things ive seen in the clubs ohhh paleezze.what guys like are girls who want to look pretty,and we trans do love being pretty.all I have to do is run up to the store and I can see exactly why men are turned off by biological women.they wear skank ass white trash sweats (gross),no makeup,hair that looks dreadfull,god awfull(sorry god),absolutely no dignity nor respect or love for themselves so how are they going to show love for another,and and ANNNND total fn bitches,sorry girls noy putting all of you in this category,but you know its true.its these same nasty asses that have the audacity to snicker and sneer at we transsexuals(just jealous over our skinny bods,fat asses haha).I put a lot of passion into looking and being a girl,unfortunately I wasn't born a girl biologically,so I have to work harder at looking the girl.(yeayea I know im no professional speller waaa bla bla bla).I do a very good job trying to pass and ive had a many of straight yes straight men tell me im pleasant to look at and I have a smoking hot bod heehee.am I perfect f no by no means nor do I act like it I accept myself just the way I am inside though im trying to always look prettier on the outside.wich leads me to my second point,men do not appreciate nasty attitude judgemental spoiled rotten daddys little bitch attitudes.i cant speak for all trans but most that I have met including wau are nice always have a smile for people are very humble(trust me we know humble because living in this extremely hatefull society weve grown very humble).we know what guys like we are very interested in pleasing our guy and to be perfectly blunt they know that we love to suck dick and most bio woman I know are repulsed by giving their man oral Really? hu? no wonder why hahaha.you know,its not rocket science its not difficult to figure out or understand,men love girls who love to dress hot sexy and a tinge of slutty.im not the most convincing in the face but I do have a hotttt bod, I don't do mens clothes ever yuuuuk,they never fit me girly clothes fit me like a glove just rite lalala,and im not afraid to go out ever im not scared I love who I am.i have had several of my male married friends say to their wives in front of everyone oooops,haha,why cant you dress and look more like Michele ohhhhhhhh fn atom bomb,run for your lives,dawn your combat gear hahaha.but guess what ladies its truuuuuuuuue lalala.men want a girl one who loooooooves being a girl,and we provide that we are understanding compassionate,loving kind considerate gentle true gentle souls and we are good listeners not blablablablabla shuuuuut up.now this isn't to say all trans are this way but most are I know,i have met some totally ruthless fn bitches straight outta hell,and I run away truuuust me cause Ize aint like a that.i am a sweetheart im cute have a beautifull smile guy have told me that they cannot resist looking at my baby blue eyes.i believe all men secretly desire dick and if anyone of them tells you OH NO WAY,they are just beating their chest and playing the MAN card,cause for sure they don't have the balls to ever admit it .trust me I have a ton of straight guy hit on me yeppers.you shoul see them follow me in the grocery store haha,yep I know your their and I know what your doing botz,but its all cool,makes me feel wonderfull about myself lalala.you can deny deny deny all you want guys but little ol Michele knows better she knows your secret mmmmmm and she likes it.trust me everyone I have yet to encounter a gay male who likes me or desires me,no such person exists think about that,gay men do not want a girl they want another man they are int man love,o yea trust me I know ive been at this for a long time now im 50 yrs. young,so who does that leave left their with that their trans girl yep,yeppers that's riiiiiiight the straight guy. its cool I don't care much for the gay guy they actually repulse me sorry,straight guys know how to treat a lady and bless their poor souls most are so sweet theyd do anything for ya all they want is someone to listen and understand they are hurting inside like the rest of us human beings wether its that nagging ass bitch wife or something mommy lacked growing up and yes you are all mommys boyz and you know it don't even go there,thats a turn off guyz,but its all good I still love crouching down in my heels and unzippin ya heehee heeeeee haha I can hear the bio bitches now,O M G how garossssss yea and that's why they come to me bitch and there aint nothing gross about it at all I love dick the bigger the better,haha.

  148. Hi everyone,

    This article is quite interesting and the posts do offer a good solid explanation as to why a straight man would date a transsexual women.

    It's a fact that transsexual porn is targeted almost exclusively at straight men. So what does it do and how does it accommodate male sensuality?

    I'm an Indian guy. I was brought up as most men to think and believe that women hate sex and masculinity.
    Actually, most females today and Feminism in general regards masculinity and manness itself as an evil and undesired element in society. I tell ya every single woman I've known has at least insinuated that view of men being unworthy and undesirable.
    Most men actually will tell you that that's the way they've been indoctrinate and treated by society. It's in the media, press, movies, video games and so on. So we men grow up believing that we're only good and useful to women when we're productive, rich and so on.
    This psychological impression will last forever. Even when proven wrong later on in life. This is what society does to men, and while I'm not gonna make it sound like a crime or anything, it does effect men and shape their psychology which included their sexuality in many ways.

    Truly it shouldn't come as a surprise that men find transsexual women more desirable. Transsexual women try hard to look feminine so that they can get a man. They pronounce their need and desire for men and masculinity, and try very hard at it. What this does is make men feel desired and appreciated. We know that transsexual women will accept us and our manliness that "ordinary" women bash and hate on. We know that the fact that they have a penis makes them sexually equal to us and able to connect with us. That penis feels the same way ours does and enjoys having sex with us as much as we enjoy having sex with them.

    Transsexual women from the standpoint of many straight men are saviors. They are blessings of this modern age.
    This includes me. I'm dating a transsexual woman and I tell ya, I'm happy. I wouldn't have any other way. This is all I needed. I don't wanna have kids of my own so I could care less about Ts women not being able to have children. That's a bonus for me actually.

    Also, the attraction is not only sexual. This is a big misconception about men who seek tswomen. We love and need love like the rest of men out there.

  149. This question actually is too general. There are a variety of reasons. It is all tied up with sexuality, concepts of the ideal woman and "type" of woman, there are questions of gender identity / orientation. There is a question or erotisisation of Transsexual women. There is a question of secretly wanting to be a transsexual woman, and maybe dreams of forced feminization. It may be tied to fetish concepts.

    With all of these things in play there are a lot of combinations and levels of desire going on.

  150. I'M 30 and just beginning to understand how amazing being TS woman actually is. There are definitely some big confidence issues with having small breast and Cock (that mostly remains inverted), not to mention lip hair is stubborn vs the laser. I'M VERY timid and have a great girlfriend so I haven't Experimented with a man yet but we are both wanting to bring a straight man into the relationship. Thank you to all the sexy guys on this post who have given me a nice confidence boost

  151. I have developed a attraction to tg women The number one primary reason for this is that NEVER have i had a lasting love relationship with a bio woman They seem to deliberately start conflict and give ZERO effort to understand men or sympathize with there difference and they get FAT with no regard to how repulsive that is to men I am not gay i could not be with a man Id be sick the instant they touch me I cant even do contact sports because the touch of a male really creeps me out

  152. I have been reading and reading and reading trying to understand my own attractions.
    Little boxes with neat labels are not fitting. There is a gender preference and sexual preference that are completely unrelated. At this time, I think I best fit polysexual gynephilic? I am completely attracted to feminine traits, curves, speech, while the whole gender preference is woman, so in a way the sexual and gender match up, but I will include pre-op, post-op, non-op in consideration as to me, the most important is a true connection and I have no problems in associating my thinking of woman to include all those I listed. I am not attracted to masculinity.

    Due to peer, society, upbringing pressure, I denied for years that I could be so attracted, but thankfully I grew up mentally a bit - double edged sword because I am now mid forties and not as attractive as I used to be in my twenties. I am comfortable enough with myself (somewhat retrosexual appearance and Alpha personality most of the time) to be able to date a transgender if it ever presents as an opportunity and not really care what my family or friends think, although the friends part might include some loss of friends. I am definitely not the chaser type and hate that I would get dumped in that category for having various things that sexually attract me, but those same things are not complete deal breakers after I get to know someone.

    I like pretty. I like slim, I like easygoing personalities and underlying strength of character. These are my preferences with GG or trans women.

    I am concerned because I have a younger child who's friends and peers would not understand me as a dad dating trans women and might cause my child grief when at school or in my neighborhood because of all the rampant transphobia and homophobia still ever present in today's American societies. I pose myself these hypothetical questions and cannot find answers that would make all parties happy. If a transwoman were to agree in aspects of stealth for a younger child's sake, but be happy with me proudly at her side and not caring about who in my adult circle knew that I dated someone that is trans, then maybe something would work, but I would feel terrible ever asking someone to hide their true self if they had made a decision that they wanted to never be stealth, and maybe I might meet someone that didn't think it anyone else's business what their past was or what was between their legs and then what if I wanted to let some people know but after discussing it with her, she never wanted to?

    Must stop asking myself these things because I can't answer myself.

    I think I would not want to generalize transwomen any more than ciswomen or men for that matter. Everyone has some individual qualities and stereotyping a group of people is what gets us into trouble, so I can't generalize transwomen.

    I do know this attraction is going on for some 20+ years and not going away. Thankfully I am single and not putting someone unsuspecting through my own battles trying to figure out who I am and what attracts me and I can be open to whomever I meet. I just wish I knew where to meet ladies that were genuinely interested in a relationship that fit my attraction criteria enough first, that I could take it further to get to know them better.

    I think I am somewhat shallow and picky when it comes to looks I'm attracted to, which probably makes me lose out on many wonderful people, but I like what I like now and it does play some importance to me in a possible long standing relationship or eventual marriage type relationship.

    I just cannot change some things about me that are natural. If I could, I might change that I am attracted to TG women. It would make things easier for me, I'm sure, but that's a lot of denying to make things easier and I'm not into denying parts of myself anymore because of outside influences.

    I think that my shallow interest in beauty has helped me decide that the sexual parts don't really matter. Put a beautiful woman with a penis in front of me and an average woman with a vagina in front of me and I would pick the woman with a penis. Average girl with penis vs. beautiful girl that was post-op, I would pick the post-op, average looking transwoman vs. beautiful ciswoman, I would pick the ciswoman....etc.

    That will get me to want to know more, but after I know more, I might start thinking the beautiful was the average and average turn to beautiful because of personality. How many times have people become more physically attracted after finding out that the person has a beautiful personality? For me it happens frequently. It's too bad I can't immediately open myself to possibilities like that, but that is just me. I'll pick the short lady over tall lady every time too if the features are as beautiful. Just a preference for short. I know it's not great already, but that's my preferences and that is what comes naturally to me (at least at this age it's natural although might be originally societal pressure for this, I have been like this for so many years I don't think I could reprogram myself).

    I don't know if I made any point here, but maybe someone else can identify with my thoughts and help themselves to figure out their own selves and attractions.

    For me, I regret being so close-minded for so many years and not just standing up for what I believe without being influenced by outside pressures. It's probably good I got divorced years ago and can figure this stuff out without confusing the hell out of my significant other.

    Now if I could only find the proper way to meet someone and had the time to devote to a new relationship, but that is another issue...

  153. This was amazing reading.

    First, I want to applaud all of Men who openly date T-Girls. As Ts, we are one of the least understood minorities and most straight and even many gays neither desire us sexually nor understand people who do. I think the best way for Transgenders to be normalized in society is for people to see them living normal lives, next door, dating normal men and women.

    I am really disappointed in men like Eddy Murphy and Hugh Grant who are clearly high profile T-girl chasers, but yet can't admit it publicly. They hurt the T-girl cause by focusing the society's attention on the sex worker population of the T Community and rendering the love of a T-girl as something that can only be done as a shameful secret.

    Second to the Genetic Women who don't understand how a boy can say they are straight yet feel comfortable having sexual interactions with someone who has or has had a penis, the answer lies in a well know fact. Men are turned on by the visual where as Women are turned on by the substance. Straight Men are turned on by the form of a Women. The T&A. The hips. The make up. etc. There are many who don't care what's under the skirt. Gay Men are turn on by the form of a Man. I have found most gay may don't want pre op Transexuals because they look like.. Women... The fact that this person who looks like a woman may have a larger penis then they have often doesn't turn on a Gay Man. Gay Men, may go to a Drag show and enjoy it, but they really like the fact that many drag performers can represent as men after the show. And Straight Men aren't turned on by sweaty muscly boys in a locker room. They may not be as concerned about the vagina vs penis distinction as long as the package looks feminine and beautiful. I'm not saying this is the formal definition of Gay vs. Straight, it is just what I've seen in practice. I have seen F2M, T-Boys, better integrated into the Lesbian community than M2F T-Girls dating Gays. Lesbians, as women, are more concerned with substance and F2M still has a vagina.

    A myth that I wish to dispel is that T-Girls are less emotional than genetic women. This can be true, However, for lack of a better phrase "Buyer Beware" Many T-girls are emotionally damaged from their history. It ain't easy being T. Also, many Ts take high does of hormones making them more moody, unpredictable and depressed than genetic girls. So when dating a T it is good to understand her emotional state. Know how stable she is before committing your heart.

    Now a bit about me. I lived the normal guy life. I was married to a beautiful woman and had two daughters. People said we looked like the Obama family when we were out in public. I worked for IBM for 19 years and left as an entry level executive. I am now in a long term relationship with CEO of midsized manufacturing company. He loves my feminine appearance, my emotional stability, and my business background. Yes, in lingerie and elegant MAC makeup, I can comfortably talk about what we've just seen on CNBC (A 24h Business News Network). Yes, I happily do all the cooking, cleaning and laundry. He financially takes care of me, although I have a six figure income. I view house work as my expression of my love for him and my contribution to the relationship. I will never make as much as him. I don't want to nor need to. But I am neither a freeloader nor gold digger. So I look for ways to give him things that money can't buy.

    In the 9 months that we've dated, our biggest fight wasn't a fight at all. Actions he was taking, I thought were dangerous. I fully understood why he was doing what he was doing but I thought he wasn't going to realize the outcome he was hoping for. Over dinner I laid out my reasoning and explained to him my feelings. I countered his every point and he is really smart so that wasn't easy. And then he showed his true colors. He considered it for about a day, tested my argument with reality and when he saw that what I was saying was true he acted on it swiftly and aggressively. He came up with solutions that were better than I could have come up with...

    I'm glad that he evaluated it himself. I don't want a push over. I want a Man. A Man that I never was capable of being (And I tried for over two decades). A Man I could admire. And this is a key point for Genetic Women to understand, it is hard to be a Man. I have found that Genetic Women think that it is only tough to be a Woman. They don't understand how hard it is to be a Man as well. Yes, there are plenty of Men who are slackers. But I have seen Women, including my exwife, who slam the Men in their lives when the guys are genuinely trying to do the right thing. Women need to think of Men like the wizard of Oz. Yes they may be leaders of society. Yes they may have cars, money, houses and things but they are also humans. And no they are not perfect and they have limitation. They need someone to work with them not criticize them. They get criticized all day long. The last thing they need when they come home is the same treatment or worse. And yes, having that experience personally has helped me in knowing how to treat my boyfriend better.

    Finally, to the Ts, care not about what Genetic Women think or say about us. This is hard because we have a tendency to want to be accepted to by Genetic Women. But what we don't realize is that Genetic Women compete and dislike other Genetic Women. Look at some of the big bullying cases that have ended with genetic girls committing suicide. These are cases of Genetic Girls bullying Genetic Girls. Genetic girls see other Genetic girls as competitive threats. If a Genetic Women is putting us down, we may be doing something right.

    I do believe, based on my own personal experience, that if a T-girl is emotionally well balanced and accomplished in their own right, they can be a perfect partner for a man who has the balls to stand up to society and honestly pursue what he wants in life.

  154. To all the haters: You will never have the heart to do what we've done: being true to ourselves. You only exist to prove us right. I am glad that you haters exist, because you what drives me. Stare all you want, hate all you want, and the end of the day we got something you will never own: self esteem, heart, courage and faith.

    I don't pass as female. But I care less about that. Beauty is nature's weapon of deception. Beauty is trickery, to snare an unsuspecting male into the vagina dentata. A mere trick to promote offspring. Nothing special about it. I'm glad I don't get judged for superficial beauty. You have a bigger problem than me, because when I find a guy who likes me, I know he likes me for who I am, not for what I look like. True love, yes. True heart, hell yes.

    You ain't fooling no one by dissing a TS woman.

    That said, I found this comment section quite amusing. The fact that people waste all their time to diss a TS woman says enough: We're not the problem, you are girl! check yourself.

  155. Michele,

    What I gather from your "post" was nonsense and not to mention, crap load of generalizations. As a BIO woman, I will refrain myself from lowering to your level because I don't want to say say hurtful things that'll make a trans cry so I won't go there. There's plenty of women who walk around with sweats on and get hit on by men regardless. Most woman love looking beautiful and receiving admiration from guys but there's more to being a woman than looking pretty and sucking dick. Historically that's why feminism was created to prove we are more than just a pretty face and not to stand in the shadow of men. You have a lot of learn and once you finish "puberty" and displaying your teen angst against bio women, hopefully you will gain maturity.

  156. Speaking for myself, I have never had any luck when it comes to guys in general. Guys love to hear themselves talk and will say what they think we want to hear just so they can get what they want.

    From what I have seen and gone through, guys are only into transwomen that are (hate using this word) "passable" because they don't want people in society to know that they're with someone who is/was born a male that has a penis.

    This is what another transgender woman said in a forum on a ts/tg dating site.......

    "Men only tell us that crap because they know that's what we want to hear and in hearing this we'll put out. No disrespect towards anyone, many of us are foolish enough to believe them because of our desperation for love and acceptance and the men know this.

    Again, natal females DON'T have to be pretty, feminine, in shape, dress nice, or even smell nice. Natal born women don't have to go to extremes to get or keep a man and nor do men expect them to, they accept them as is where as with us it's a different story.

    Many of us try to compare ourselves to natal women when in reality we'll NEVER be put on the same scale as them again most men claim to see no difference in us but that's also b.s. because if this was true then why don't most of us have long term on going relationships? Why don't most of the men want to be seen with us? Why do we have to be kept a secret/hidden? What's the problem if they see us in the same light? The answers are right in front of us all we have to do is open our eyes."

    That's the real truth.

  157. I started out as a hetro sexual with a fetish for wearing womens clothing. A twist of fate I ended up with breast due to a med reaction. I was married to live a hetero life style with a woman who loved breast play mostly my breasts. but thats not the question here. Since we are now divorced I have been dating Bi men but seeking a woman that would enjoy both sides of me.
    The thing I have discovered is men date us Tg because were not a hormonal roller coaster. We usually don't have a headache almost every night. We dress sexier than our genetic counterpart women do.
    I still live in both worlds. I have dated several women and they all have one thing in common they get themselves all prettied up for a date. We go out but they don't put out. Then they complain there are no real men.
    On the flip of things. Most men are idiots. I have only meet a hand full of what I would call a true gentlemen and actually know how treat a woman.I have been stood up no phone call of where there at then they call two days later like nothings wrong. Left wanting more sexually because once they have they're fun they're done. When I ask if this what they do to their Genetic women they say yes. most men have no clue how to satisfy a a real woman or a trans woman. Most men I've meet and or gone out with are married. When I ask them about their wives. Most of their wives have hormonal issues and are not being treated or are refusing to get treatment for it. one thing they all agree on is their wives never have or will wear sexy lingerie for them.
    This my conclusion. Real women need to open up you don't need to wear it to work or all the time but put on some sexy lingerie. If your are losing your sex drive see your doctor.Single women spread those legs and and open up to what a man is really after.
    Men learn how to make your woman soar have nultiple orgasams before you do.When it come to Tg women make sure you have satisfied her before your self.
    If all sexes would learn how to satisfy each other sexually you will also find the real human being we are intended to be or be with.It may sound like all Im focusing on is sex but to learn how to fulfill your partners needs and wants you half to communicate it. If you can learn to tell your partner how to do that communicating all other life matters will be easy.

  158. I found reading these posts to be educational, supportive, offensive, showing a great level of ignorance on the part of some..in general..as varied as there are perceptions. I was born both male and female (a hermaphrodite)..I walk a tight rope between the male and female genders on a daily basis by preference. I've dated men..had male AND female lovers. I consider myself more male than female simply because I have that option. A common thought in society seems to be that male=dick/female=vagina. Some of the men I've met have proven themselves to be ABSOLUTE DICKS in the worst way. I may not have ALL the parts I need to fit in to what most people would consider to be "a real woman" but I'm no less a woman than any other woman you see on the street, on a bus, in the neighboring car, or the apartment across the street.

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