Throughout history men had sex one with each another and relished the experience. Etruscan tombs in Italy, for instance, have paintings of men getting involved sexually with other men. Sex between men has persisted despite the persecution by clergymen, judges, and doctors.
To have sex as a bottom and enjoy it, you may have to overcome some negative attitudes about your anus. The best preparation for being a bottom is to explore your anus and some of the sensations it can provide. Some men like to do the following exercises in the bathtub. The warm water helps you to relax, and the bathroom provides some privacy for gay men who still live with their family.
Wash your anus, including just inside, with soap and water. Lubricate your finger with your preferred lubricant and insert it into your anus. As you feel increasingly relaxed, apply more lubricant and push deeper. You’ll feel the sphincter muscles at this point; these need to relax baby if you wanna feel pleasure. Deliberately tighten them. You’ll be surprised how strong they are. Relax them. Grip and relax these muscles several times.
Now move your finger in deeper. You’ll find the sphincter muscles are more extensive than you thought, and they open and relax of their own accord around your exploring finger. If they don’t, stop and relax for a minute or two.
Once your finger gets beyond the inner sphincter, it enters the rectum, a wider space. You’ll notice the change in texture. Move your finger in and out a couple of inches at a time. If you’ve been fearful about anal penetration until now, you’ll be amazed how easy this is. Remove your finger, breathe deeply, and relax. Tell yourself out loud that you’re coming along beautifully. Complimenting yourself may seem absurdly narcissistic, but in fact it’s a useful reinforcement, well known to behavioral psychologists. If, after this break, you insert your finger again, you’ll notice how much more easily it goes in but don’t rush. Ironically, going slowly gets you in faster.
After several exploratory sessions, try two fingers. If you feel the sphincter muscles closing, return to the tightening and relaxing exercises. You may now use a dildo if the idea appeals to you. Make sure it’s reasonably sized, and not one of those monsters that stunt artists absorb.
Two other exercises may be of value. First, if you have a sex buddy or lover, ask him to explore your hole with his fingers. Then put your finger in his anus.
One note of caution. Fingers, dildos, and penis can be pleasurable and safe. Never try anything else. No glass bottles, sweet potatoes, or other exotic objects. They may elude your grasp, get lost in your colon, and require major surgery.
You should prepare in a number of ways for being bottom for the first time. Physically, all you need to do is to clean yourself out with a small enema. Some men find that a squirt from an ear syringe does the job well enough. You should also have condoms ready, and always insist that your partner use them. We strongly advise you not to drink alcohol heavily or to use mind-altering drugs at this time. They may interfere with good judgment about safe sex. Choose whatever lubricant you generally use.
There are two good positions to start out with. In the easier one, both you and your partner lie on your side, pitcher’s front to catcher’s back. However, sometimes a novice will prefer to be on top so he can control the situation. In this position you face your partner, who is on his back, and you sit on his penis. Being on top will relieve what may be one of the main anxieties: that he will enter too quickly.
The first few times you are bottom you may have the uncomfortable sensation that you are about to defecate. Only after several experiences will you learn to tell the two sensations apart.